Whoa whoa WHOA. 2 posts in one day? I’M CRAZY LIKE THAT. I won’t keep you. I know it’s Saturday morning and you have cartoons to watch and maybe a crossword puzzle to solve over 13 gallons of coffee. BUT, I just haaave to make you make these bloody Mary oyster shots. Tomorrow, right now, […]
I just don’t think life would be rightly fair if bistro week didn’t include ohhhh let’s see, ANOTHER pasta dish. Ya know, I’m going to really miss bistro week. I’m starting to get used to my mustache. Okay so bucatini. Have you ever had it? It’s like a thick spaghetti with a hole down the […]
So, as bistro week continues (the only real thing I learned about the meaning of “bistro” is that I need to grow a mustache for true authenticity. DONE. And gross.) we’re having steak and potatoes! By the way, bistro week did in fact start on Monday with Aaron’s pasta, and then on Tuesday with soup, […]
What does bistro mean? Because in a coffee-induced hyper episode on Saturday, I deemed this week as BLOG BISTRO WEEK. And then realized I have no idea what that means. And that I was talking to air. But I do know that it’s one of those words that when you say more than thrice, it […]
You guys, where have I been? What on earth have I been doing my entire life? How has it taken me nearly 36 years to make fah-rickin’ PARMESAN CRISPS? Oh right, I’ve been obsessed with trying to find the world’s best deep conditioning hair treatment. Well, and solving crimes. Der. Parmesan Crisps are my new […]
Husbands. Whatever. I love how I can spend 417 hours a day in the barrels of food obsession, wrestling multiple brain aneurysms trying to dream up the pimpest recipe combinations, researching every last cobwebby corner of the webs and magazine pages until I’m blue in the face for a single speck of inspiration for the […]
Yeaaah I’m pretty sure that punt wasn’t even in the huddle when the kicker handed off that line of scrimmage in the neutral zone. Pretty sure of it. And then when that one interception turned into a fumble around the field goal, when it was blocking the blitz bomb? Totally didn’t see that coming. My […]
Say that super fast, 5 times in a row. I actually tried it and my mouth looked really jank so I stopped. So, okay, these taco cups? Total last minute decision this week and probably the best one I’ve made since purchasing a bra that actually fits. Hahaha! Cups, bra… Uhhh, seriously why won’t I […]
So it’s 1986. I’m 10 years old, and my sister Barbara is 6. We’d just moved to the sweaty armpit of the UNIVERSE, Hobbs, New Mexico and were getting settled into our new lifestyle which involved tumbleweeds, fake red cowboy boots from the Walmart and a crimp iron. Not known to be shy, (WEIRD!) Bar […]
Some things in life just aren’t in my control. Things like death and taxes. Things like natural disasters, plagues and famine. Things like accidentally finding myself at Pryde’s foaming at the mouth over a football-shaped cookie cutter so that I can make ridiculous football pizzas in order to feel festive in my little life. Out […]
