Whoa whoa WHOA. 2 posts in one day? I’M CRAZY LIKE THAT. I won’t keep you. I know it’s Saturday morning and you have cartoons to watch and maybe a crossword puzzle to solve over 13 gallons of coffee. BUT, I just haaave to make you make these bloody Mary oyster shots. Tomorrow, right now, […]
What does bistro mean? Because in a coffee-induced hyper episode on Saturday, I deemed this week as BLOG BISTRO WEEK. And then realized I have no idea what that means. And that I was talking to air. But I do know that it’s one of those words that when you say more than thrice, it […]
Yeaaah I’m pretty sure that punt wasn’t even in the huddle when the kicker handed off that line of scrimmage in the neutral zone. Pretty sure of it. And then when that one interception turned into a fumble around the field goal, when it was blocking the blitz bomb? Totally didn’t see that coming. My […]
So, I’ve rearranged a few priorities in my life. Oh, no no – listening to Wilson Phillips on repeat is still at the top. As well as honing my breakdancing in a giant eggshell costume craft. I’ve not gone off the deep end or anything, YOU GUYS. I’ve just decided to braise things more often. […]
Okay so technically it’s, “Since June!” but we can pretend.* I’ve learned that you guys love food that involves spoons. Soupy food with a million spoons. And also forks. Foods that call for forks that wrap around silky noodles and sauces. And also foods that involve neither spoons nor forks, like pizza or sub sandwiches. […]
I think I’m dead. No, no I’m sure of it. Because after my face turned into an anteater and vacuumed up a trough of this white wine sauce last night, I passed on and went to a better place. But it’s cool. I’m not going to make you do anything with me involving wet clay. […]
Go ahead and blow up the kiddie pool. And maybe aim the sprinkler system at your eyeballs. Because when your tongue meets this un.fa.lip.pin.ing.be.liev.able sauce, your sinuses are going to give you the bird. I don’t want to scare you, but daaaaaaad GUM, this meal will punch you in the face. And I’m no sissy […]
Remember this from Instagram land? WELL, it’s now available at a website near you! I call it the “Christmas Kitchen Sink Soup” because: a) It’s all Christmas-y with some serious cinnamon and nutmeg business. b) You can pretty much throw anything into this soup (except ornaments, duh) and still have your face melt off in […]
DING DONG. The doorbell rings. The sun has set. I’m in egg nog-stained yoga pants and my sock bun doth saggeth. Gripping the 14 heart attacks scrambling to escape my chest bone, I walk over to the kitchen window and peek out to see a UPS truck zipping away, leaving me with a gigantic cardboard […]
Let’s start here. While this isn’t the sexiest thing you might ever look at, once you taste it, you’re going to shed your earthly skin and become a new angelic force fiercely whipping through layers of psychedelic taste bud clouds, proclaiming victory at every turn. See the below ingredients? I almost can’t believe I’m about […]
