Oh I am just pickled tink! Need a minute for that? Truth be told, this whole pickling thing wasn’t even my idea. Last weekend, Aaron had zipped out to the store to pick up some fly traps I thought (hi, my house is invaded. I’m like, where is the body?), but upon arrival, he slipped […]
HEY, Y’AAAAALLLLLL. We’re breaking new boundaries today! We’re covering new territory! We’re broadening our horizons! And we’re using an obnoxious amount of exclamation points! We’re frying okra. But not just any okra! Purple okra. Which, okay you can just ignore that because it’s the exact same as green okra. It totally turns green when you […]
(to be read to the tune of “release me” by wilson phillips. and I am so, so sorry.) I know that it’s time for a change Mmm but when that change comes Will you still taste the same? How many times have I longed to grill you when it’s cold? I don’t want to give […]
(to be sung to the theme of the Brady Bunch. ahem.) Here’s the story of a grilled cheese sandwich. Who was bored of simply being on her own. She’d been grilled and grilled and grilled, like the others. Yet she felt all alone. Here’s the story, of some almond butter. And some apple slices, carrot […]
You want to cradle them, don’t you? I’ll tell you what, my mouth cradled about 50 of them at one time like a bowling alley does with its pins. And you should know, I plan on making SENSE in my next life. Today it’s all about the back to schools. Not that mini cheeseburgers have […]
Why yes there is a giant bite missing from that one bottom right piece. Oops? Okay, I have a few things to say. Does that make you nervous? 1) Um, t-h-a-n-k-y-e-w-a-l-l for the sweet and awesome well wishes on my b-day last week! Social media sure does know how to make a gal feel eempartunt. […]
Oh no we di’iiiint! Surprise, Jenny! I made you eggs. Get it? Like, the eggs in your uterus that became a human? AND they’re deviled, since you’re having a boy human. I MEAN RIGHT? Ya know, I’m really diggin’ on the idea of a virtual baby shower like this, because it eliminates the possibility of […]
Oh hey! I survived the lighthouse. You guys, it was seriously 214 steps high into the heavens of angel territory. Narrow little see-through steps. Uuuuuup.chuck. I was wearing a long skirt and it was whipping around my ankles, so I absolutely freaked out thinking it was going to tangle up in my legs and cause […]
Ohhhh back to school. Back to school. To prove to dad that I’m not a fool. I got my lunch packed up, my boots tied tight. I hope I don’t get in a fight OHHHHHH back to school. Back to sch – yeah okay I can chill. Let’s dry some fruit! Are you wondering why […]
T-minus 48 hours until I go on vacation, y’alls. Okay so what does “T-minus” mean anyway? I always feel like whoever says it needs to be wearing aviators, small headphones and a brown bomber jacket. Teddy bear-minus? Thunderstorm-minus? Tap shoes-minus? Tomato hummus-minus? I’m going to look it up. Hold on real quick . . . […]
