FrRFRFRFRFffffffrrrrrrrrFRFRFRFRrrrrrrrFFFFRRRRRrrrrrrFFFFRFRFRFrrrrridee. Okay, teacher readers. I HAVE AN APPLE TO PICK WITH YOU. (Haha! Did you see what I did there? Instead of a bone to pick, it’s an apple? Because you’re a teache- right.) (And I don’t really have a bone slash apple to pick. I’m teasing. I love you all. Don’t leave me.) But […]
FrrrrrrrrrrrrrrEEDEEDOODAAAHDULLYDIMDO. I need help! You’re like, “How does this woman even make it an hour by herself.” I need a navy blazer. I’ve needed a navy blue blazer since the navy blazer was invented and I’ve never had a navy blazer! Every fall rolls around and I’m like, “YES, IT’S NAVY BLAZER HUNT TIME,” and […]
FFFFFFFFFFFleelee. Okay. So. I have a question. And I’m serious. Super serious. Here goes. When you make a peanut butter sandwich, do you use one knife, or two? One for the peanut butter, and one for the jelly? Or do you use one knife for BOTH the peanut butter and the jelly? And if you […]
FlooooooooooooRIDAY. We finished Younger last night! (!!) And by we I mean my bestie that binges all these shows with me. We always finish out each series together, with a bottle of rosé and a block of cheese, while watching the rest remotely. GET IT? REMOTE? LIKE THE TV REMO- you did. Okay. Also, by […]
Frah rah rah rah Freh reh reh reh Frih rih rih rih day. GUESS WHAT. (I’m just jumping in.) YOU ARE NOT GOING TO BELIEVE THIS. (promise I’ll simmer down.) IT HAPPENED. (you’re like, I’m already over this.) I GOT THE OFFICIAL LETTER IN THE MAIL. (you’re like, good for you, you renewed your This […]
FFFFFFalksdjflasdjfad erder. Why no, a toddler’s not at my laptop, why do you ask? Guys, listened to what happened. And I’ll make this short. (FAT CHANCE) So, we ordered this lovely outdoor sectional from Hayneedle. I’ve never bought anything from this site before, have you? And it arrives. And it’s a GIANT box. We carefully […]
FLLLLLLLLLLAAAAAAHDEEEDAY. Do you sleep in a bra? Dudes be like, PASS. But, do you? Is this a thing? Sleeping in your bra? Over the 4th of July, I was drinking rosé absurdly early in the day with a couple of besties, and we were talking about boobs. (#duh) Sleeping in your bra came up, and […]
FfFfFfFfRrRrRrRrRrIIIIIIIIIIDAR. We’ve been here TWO WEEKS. Well, two weeks tomorrow. Two weeks tomorrow night at 6:13pm, EST. Not that I’m that nerdy loon who remembers every time stamp in life. (read: I’m that nerdy loon who remembers every time stamp in life.) But do you want to know what majorish slash minorish but still sort […]
FRRRRRERDER. We’ve been here a WEEK. Well, a week tomorrow. A week tomorrow evening at 6:13pm, EST. Not that I’m that psycho freak who remembers every time stamp in life (read: I’m that psycho freak who remembers every time stamp in life). But it feels like 13 YEARS ago. In that healthy glow way. EXCEEEEPT […]
FLRRRRRRoopey. Er, Fridya. Friday. I’m not one who picks at zits. Or scratches as scabs. Or pops those awful sunburn liquid bubbles. You’re like, “WTF HOW DID I GET HERE.” But you know that flaky brown stuff, what is it – CRADLE CAP that’s on top of your kids’ heads? And it gets darker in […]
