Crab Salad with Celery

Oh oops there’s jumbo lump crab in this salad, oops.

Sure it’s Friday and sure it’s always to fun to end the week with something super decadent and oozy and rich and slow-motion-in-front-of-a-fan worthy. Sure.

But get this. We can totally do that with this crab and celery salad! Oh but we can!

ALLOW ME TO ELABORATE: (you just rolled your eyes I could feel it)

A) Jumbo lump crab. I almost can’t type it out without completely losing my mind. Have you ever had it? Yes it’s stupid expensive. But go to the store today, pick up a little can, open it, drain it, stick your nose right down in that and TELL me you don’t momentarily slip into the fourth dimension. Just try and tell me.

B) Crunchy, crispy celery. Ya don’t often think about celery being a staple in a salad, but it’s actually quite stellar in this here situation. AND did you know that you actually burn calories while eating celery? Yeah! All the work it takes to chew it, you’re totally working out. I think I learned this from Clueless or something. So we know we can trust it.

C) I want to wax your face off about the hard-boiled eggs and the juicy halved cherry tomatoes and the bright lemon dressing and all that fresh parsley, but honestly, all I can think about is the crab. The craaaaabbbbaaaa. (Oh! Let’s start a band: Crabba) It’s like dumping solid gold into your face with a backhoe. No imitation, duders. Jumbo lump it. I’m telling you, SNIFF THAT CAN.and.you.will.see.a.new.way.

So see? You can picture it now. There we are, with a huge platter of this crab and celery salad. A fan blowing our Farrah Fawcett hair, in a red bathing suit. Okay ew scratch the bathing suit idea. But we’re slowly shoveling loads of salad into our heads, bedroom-eying the camera, in slow motion, and a little piece of the succulent crab kind of dribbles down our chin, but we don’t care, and some parsley gets stuck in our teeth, but whatever, we’re so happy. So blissful. So euphoric.

So . . . okay, weird.

MAKE THIS.

Crab Salad with Celery:

(totally inspired by Lidia)

What it took for 1 large salad:

* 2 eggs, hard-boiled and roughly chopped
* 4 stalks celery, diced
* 1(6.5 oz) can jumbo lump crab, drained
* 1/4 cup cherry tomatoes, halved
* 1/3 cup freshly chopped parsley
* 2 Tbs. extra-virgin olive oil
* 2 Tbs. fresh lemon juice
* coarse salt and freshly ground pepper

In a large bowl combine the eggs through the parsley.

In a small bowl whisk together the oil, lemon juice, a pinch of salt and pepper.

Now this is hard stuff, so pay attention. Drizzle the dressing over the crab and celery salad. Toss it. That’s . . . it.

Eat!

OMG it’s so insane you don’t even know.

What about a baby blue bathing suit?!