Friday. !!!!!! ……. !!!!!!!! . ! I’d like to openly and shamelessly admit something to the world right now. I may lose readers, but that’s okay. I may lose friends, but I just have to stand up for myself right now. I might even lose FAMILY, but this is a risk I’m willing to take. […]
FWIDAY. WHAT BWINGS US. TUGEVAAA. TODAAAY. Look. I’m going to go ahead and address the tomato in the room. (name that show) I know it’s on everyone’s minds, I can sense it. But no one wants to be the one to ask the burning question. But I’ll ask. I’m not afraid. WHERE IS NEW GIRL? […]
FRIDAY! And not only that- HALLOWEEN WEEKEEEND. (not even sorry to scream) I cannot deal with dry cleaning. Any tag that says “dry clean only,” I’m like PASS. Actually, remember Mitch Hedberg’s old bit about dry clean only? “This shirt is dry clean only. Which means . . . it’s dirty.” Hahahah! My life. I […]
friday !!!!!!! Can we talk about garlic cloves for a second? Not like, the flavor or anything, but the actual clove size, and the b.s. morphing of shrivelment that occurs over a short amount of time. I always think about asking you about this when I’m IN the kitchen, frustrated as pathetic slivers of wimpy […]
f R I D A y. I almost skipped Flotsam this week. My alarm went off this morning at booty:30 and I was like, really? Do I have to? I think I’ll stay in bed. I don’t really have anything to say. They wouldn’t even notice! But unfortunately my […]
FFFFFfffffRRRRRrrrrrIIIIIiiiiiDDDDDdddddAAAAAaaaaaYYYYYyyyyy. You would not BELIEVE the week Natalie has had. I’m telling you guys. Well, I’m about to tell you right now. Poor little noodle bug. So two days ago, Wednesday, we set out for a morning walk to the grocery store/hardware store, got back, la dee da, and relocated out back to play in […]
FRAWDAW. So I just woke up from this dream (no worries, I’m not going to put you through what I did a few weeks ago), and it’s got me really pondering something. In the dream I was sitting in like, a hotel lobby or something. And this dude that I went to high school with, […]
F rida Y! Let’s talk TV. And I’m just going to jump right in- DID YOU WATCH THE MUPPETS?! omg. I know there’s a lot of controversy out there over this one, but I gotta tell ya: we straight loved it. Absolutely loved it. It’s basically identical to […]
FREE LEE LEE LEE LEEEEEE. day. Let’s talk lipstick. Now, to the naked eye, it would appear that I might have a thing for red lipsticks. But guess what! You’re right. However, I’m actually extremely horrible at picking out lipstick. A) I’m mildly terrified of variety. and B) decisions of this caliber completely stress me […]
I just blew my nose and I swear it sounded exactly like the coffee grinder. Also, FRIDAY! I have to tell you about this crazy dream I just had. If I can remember it. You know how dreams are. You wake up and you’re like, IN IT, and then five seconds later you’re like, “Wait, […]
