FF ff would you believe my f key is STUCK? FFF like stuck. I actually just popped it out! The f key just came o my keyboard. OFF my keyboard. What do I do?! It’s bright under there. Like a little glowy alternate universe with tiny men in silver jumpsuits and gray hair and wait […]
Frrrrroopy droopy doopy doo. (doo) Guys I have the most humiliating story in the entire world to tell you. You’re going to disown me. I would disown me, too. I already did. So last week, my girl Ashlee slides into my dm (just kidding) sends me a message via Facebook messenger. It’s sort of late […]
FRRRRRRRAH! duh. How are you with honking? I don’t mean like, what does it look like when your hand lays on the horn. More like, do you honk? Is honking something you’re into? Are you a breezy honker? (“You can’t say you’re breezy! It negates the breezy!”) I can’t honk. I can’t do it. Even […]
FAAAAALFALRALRALDALDAL day. Dude I had the worst dream just now. Just right now before I woke up this morning. Like an hour ago. Worst dream. It was one of those anxiety dreams, you know, like when you’re on campus but you have no idea where your classroom is, or when the test is, or where […]
FRRRRRRRRthis is the most color you’ll ever see on this siteDAY. I think we need to discuss foundation. Not like, for your house. This is not hard hat material here, folks. FACE. Face foundation. Facial foundation. Oh wait! Do you want to know what’s weird? For a HOUSE, the foundation is under it. And for […]
FRRRRRRReak out! FreakY, I meant. Like Freaky Friday. Never mind. 11 days, 15 hours, 51 minutes and 10 seconds (9. . .8. . .7) left UNTIL SPRING. Goodbye. I know it’s hard to believe with the naked eye, but this photo is not staged. What, you mean the yellow figure skating dress on the floor […]
FFFFFFreelahlulahlaylahyay. Who do you think the ORIGINAL Team-Off was? That made no sense. Let me start over. You know how we’ve been saying team this or team that for a bazillion eons now? Team Edward or Team Jacob. Team Ben or Team Noel. Team Aniston or Team Pitt. (<–remember?!?!) Team Jess or Team Logan. Team […]
FRRRRRRRRRRewey dew! I dunno. Do you make the bed? What I mean is, when do you make the bed? What I MEAN is, how do you make the bed? What I MEAN MEAN is, are you into making your bed? This blog post already completely sucks. What I MEAN EEEES, is making the bed something […]
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF r i d y a. I mean a y. What exactly do you do with witch hazel? Besides get excited about using the words witch and hazel back to back. What does it do? What does it heal? What ancient voodoo of yesterlore do I need to absorb for ultimate life happiness? I just […]
FrarDEE FRI. (<–do you ever tire of these? didn’t think so.) SO GUESS WHAT! (just jumping right in.) We officially booked our Oregon summer home! Which, when I say “Oregon summer home,” I realize that it sounds like I’m all Midge Maisel with one hand swooping up into the air as I clutch a little […]
