Chai Tea Popcorn

Do you make homemade popcorn? We make homemade popcorn. Let’s make homemade popcorn.

But let’s make it cray! Just kidding, I don’t say cray. I say BAE, but not cray. Good heavens, never cray.

I used to say cray, but not anymore. I noticed it would make my hair fall out, so I stopped saying it. It got pretty cray. Crap!

Anyway, what?

Oh yes, Chai tea popcorn – ON THE STOVE, BAE.

I thought it might be fun to slide in a lil’ snack post, in the midst of all the gravy, the turkey, the green bean casseroles, the stuffings, WHAT HAVE YOU, and focus on something a little lighter. A little crunchier. A little munchier.

P.S. That might look like a lot of coconut oil in that little bowl up there, but you know what?? It is. It’s like 3 Tbs. Maybe a hair more. (<–sick)

First of all, do you make popcorn at home? Not in a bag in the microwave, but REAL kernels on a REAL stove with REAL LIFE HANDS. Do you?

I’ve always been a bit ehhh about those popcorn bags that you microwave. Don’t they have botulism in them? Or cave crickets? I’m pretty sure they do.

And besides, making popcorn on the stove maaaaaybe takes two minutes longer. And it’s so worth it! You can play with the flavors, control your salt, add more butter. And more butter. And fine, a little more butter. This butter detail is what holds our planet on its axis. I think.

However, I have a question! When you buy popcorn, do you buy the white kernels or the yellow? Do you know the difference? I’d look it up myself but I have to fold toddler laundry today, and that’s already too much on my plate.

We tend to buy the yellow, because I feel like it’s old school. But I also buy Aqua Net, so clearly I’m not well skilled at life decisions.

So this recipe: ALL you need are pantry staples. A single bag of Chai tea (I love the little speckles of black dots! they look like poppy seeds, but you don’t have to worry about jail time because they’re not drugs), some coconut oil, butter, cinnamon and sugar! (and salt)

The only special ingredient you might need to seek out are the coconut flakes. To me they’re a pantry staple, because I love tossing them on cooked lime rice (help me). But seriously, coconut flakes take this popcorn from here (hand at my knees) to HERE (hand on Mars, dabbling in the liquid water).

I also love cooking popcorn in coconut oil, because it’s weird: not only does it infuse the popcorn with a pleasant coconut flavor, but it makes the POPCORN taste even more POPCORNIER. How it does this, we’ll never know.

(does “popcornier” need to be added to my list of things never, ever to say again?)

You’ll add melted butter to this at the end, and it is glorious.

You’ll add fresh cinnamon to this at the end, and it is magnificent.

You’ll add a pinch of sugar to this at the end, and it is wonderful.

You’ll add a single bag of Chai tea to this at the end, and it is marvelous.

You’ll add toasted coconut flakes to this at the end, and it is ridiculous.

You’ll add your entire head to this at the end, and it is cray.

CRAP!

Snack time.

• 3 Tbs. coconut oil
• 1/3 cup popcorn kernels
• 3 Tbs. melted butter
• 1 Chai tea bag, sliced open as you’ll only use the contents
• 1 tsp cane sugar
• 1/2 tsp freshly ground cinnamon (add more if you want!)
• 1 small pinch of salt
• 1/2 cup (or more!) toasted coconut flakes

Instructions

1. Melt the coconut oil in a large pot over medium high. Add two or three kernels to the melted oil and cover. Once they pop, take the pot off the heat and add the remaining kernels in a single layer. Cover and let sit for 30 seconds. Move the pan back to the heat and cook until all the kernels have popped, shaking the pan slightly to make sure all the kernels are popping. Once there are a few seconds between pops, turn off the heat.
2. Transfer the popcorn to a large serving bowl. Add the melted butter (hear the sizzle!), the loose Chai tea, sugar, cinnamon, salt and coconut flakes. Toss until everything is incorporated. Inhale forever and ever.

This ^^ is what my life looks like 5923634360923% of the time.