Friday Flotsam

Freaky Friday. Not really. Just Friday. Unless you think I’m freaky. On Friday. Then Freaky Friday.

herb pots in LA

I think I’m ready for a house cleaner.

Not like, a constant cleaner, always here. But someone to come in every other week to do the hardcore stuff.

I think I’m ready.

And you know what, I’m finding that house cleaner talk is EXACTLY LIKE BOTOX TALK. At first, no one wants to admit they do it. But they want to do it. They’re dying to do it. And then as soon as they utter the desire to do it, 8/9ths of their friends ALREADY DO IT.

“Oh yeah, I’ve had a house cleaner for years.”

“YOU HAVE? But you work from home!”

“Toilets can rot in in hell, man.”

These are the conversations I’m having, you guys. I think I’m ready.

Because for so long I felt so weird about it! Someone else coming in to do something I CAN DO. And my obsessive frugal nature has always kept me from spending money on something I viewed as totally unnecessary.

But you guys, I think I’m ready.

“Girl, it’s sanity money!”

“Think of all the time you’ll get back!”

“Toilets can rot in hell, man.”

These are the conversations I’m having, you guys. I think I’m ready.

Do you have a house cleaner? Just like, a small team of baseboard attackers, bathroom bombers, hardwood handlers, dusting dancers, sanitizing saints, disinfecting darlings?

Am I missing out? Am I completely insane for not already having one? (don’t answer that.)

I think I’m ready.

(and for more botox. duh.)

cute bathroom tile in NYC

Ceiling fan shopping makes me murdery.


apartments in NYC


Which in my head came out as “NO. SLEEP. ‘TIL BROOKLYYYYN!” But I wasn’t going for that. I don’t think.

I’m trying to wrap my head around how to prepare for this, and I’m totally clueless. Other than to have the car serviced and argue with Aaron about four year olds having their own kid-friendly electronic devices. He’s a hard NUH-UH on this, and I’m like, “But five days in a caaar with theeeeeeem waaaaaaaaaah.”

I MEAN, I get it. I do. It’s not the most ideal situation for their age. But those little kindle fire thingies with games on them – HOW BAD CAN THAT REALLY BE? We had a DVD player back there, for crying out loud. Isn’t it the same dang thing?

He wants to go the old school route with busy bags. Whiiiiich translates to me as MESSES THAT MOM CLEANS UP. (hashtag group mom high five)

Am I so terrible that I want to keep them entertained with games and songs on a tiny screen?

I mean, I don’t want to start WORLD WAR THREE HERE.

20 hours. One way. In a car. With two four year olds.

I rest my case.

lunch at Fairfax, NYC

Are you watching Handmaid’s Tale!? Is it as insane and disturbing as Season 1? I’m trying to mentally gear up before I abuse my psyche repeatedly with a bat.

Actually, I can’t decide if I want to jump right in, or toggle (toggle?) between Handmade and Schitt’s. Between Tale and Creek. Ha! oh.

Maybe I should toggle. Maybe watching both at the same time will keep me more grounded in this world.

Wait, is Schitt’s Creek anything like Dawson’s Creek? Wait, is it the SAME CREEK?

It’s not the same creek. I’m just kidding.

Wait, is it?

I’m so excited about a house cleaner.

flowers in NYC

Weekend plans?

The weather is going to be FABULOUS. Absolutely flawless. We have a big home shoot today, but once that’s wrapped I plan on being outside EVERY SINGLE MOMENT OR ELSE.

Maaaaaybe chicken enchies tomorrow for Cinco de Drinko? Maaaaybe work on pimping our backyard hammock area? Maaaaaybe get a few more shade plants out front in our landscaping? Maaaaaybe secretly order kid-friendly kindles? Maaaaaybe host a fun minimal jewelry giveaway on Instagram for Mother’s Day? Uh huh, girl.

Definitely listening to the new mixtape! (don’t just love on Christmas music, guys. come on.)

Tell me what you’ll cook this weekend. You know I need these details to thrive in this world.

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34 Responses to Friday Flotsam

  1. ML May 4, 2018 at 8:09 am #
    Cleaning person all.the.way. There's nothing better than coming home every other Friday to a clean house. Clean.Toilets.
  2. Rachel May 4, 2018 at 8:14 am #
    Ohhhh, the screen time argument. My husband and I don't always see eye to eye either. I will say it's a pandora box. I used it on a road trip and my son associated it with the car. From then on he wanted it everytime we got in the car. It was a fight to reel the usage back in. Now only on airplanes! I found that children's podcast work fantastically. He will listen to stories / music for a couple of hours.
  3. Amanda May 4, 2018 at 8:44 am #
    Hire a cleaning service that has a "team". Mine sends 5 women and they knock my house out in under 2 hours! LOVE cleaning day! Get them ipads, I have 3 kids and HATE car travel. ipads saved my life....
  4. Deanna May 4, 2018 at 8:57 am #
    I hired a cleaning lady when I was working 6 days a week because he’ll would freeze over before I spent my only day off cleaning. Now I’m in a different country and unemployable and I MISS HER SO MUCH!
  5. Jill May 4, 2018 at 9:33 am #
    I have taken two recent LONG car rides with my 4 year old and the Kindle SAVED. MY. LIFE. I barely knew she was in the backseat. It was glorious and doesn't seem to have damaged her too much in the long run..... Highly recommend!
  6. Carlie May 4, 2018 at 9:51 am #
    We have a cleaning lady that we love. Before hiring her we fought over whose turn it was to clean the shower...with her it's turned us into a much nicer couple. We are having to get rid of her because I'm quitting my job, and I'm already anticipating the murdery looks when shower cleaning week arrives.
  7. Jess May 4, 2018 at 9:51 am #
    My husband got the house cleaned as my Mothers Day gift and now I think I’m addicted! How can i ever clean my house again? It was amazing!
  8. Nicole May 4, 2018 at 10:10 am #
  9. Ashley May 4, 2018 at 10:14 am #
    I feel like the first two episodes of Handmaid's Tale S2 were more disturbing than the first season combined! So... alternating with something lighter is a good idea. :)
  10. Joanna E May 4, 2018 at 10:19 am #
    Bev, Having a cleaner is a game changer, 100 bajillion % would recommend! Also, your shoes in the tile picture - can you share who makes them and where you can buy them? Love following your blog thanks for all of the giggles!
    • Bev Weidner May 7, 2018 at 4:02 pm #
      Hey, Joanna! SO, I thrifted the nude pumps, but I did a quick google search after reading the brand on the sole, and looks like you find them anywhere!
      • Joanna E May 8, 2018 at 10:12 am #
        Thank you so much, Bev! The hunt is on!
  11. Ashlee May 4, 2018 at 10:31 am #
    All the yeses. Yes. Cleaning Lady. Yes. Kid's Kindle Fire.
  12. Jen Renee May 4, 2018 at 11:55 am #
    My house cleaner comes every other Friday, and the toddler and I go do the grocery shopping for the week while they clean. It works out great. I think as moms we clean constantly, just to keep the house from turning into a wreck. Having someone come in every other week to help with the deep cleaning is great! No regrets. :)
  13. Joy May 4, 2018 at 1:30 pm #
    Definitely go with the cleaning person!!! It is the best thing ever!! Mine comes every other week. I first hired them when I was working full time. Then I switched to part time and debated keeping them on. But it was the best decision. So DO IT!!!
  14. Mary May 4, 2018 at 1:33 pm #
    I had a house cleaner when I was preggo with my twins up until they were about a year old. Sanity saver!!!
  15. Shannon May 4, 2018 at 2:14 pm #
    Oh man, I so badly want to have someone clean my house too and then I joined a book club and we read Nickel and Dimed by Barbara Ehrenreich and now I can't do it because of that book. Blast that book club.
  16. Stefanie May 4, 2018 at 2:59 pm #
    Cinco De Drinko... I like it. I have no earthly idea what I'm cooking this weekend and am kinda bummed that no one else has answered that question because I was looking for ideas masulf. Literally just had golden raisins straight from the trader joes bag for lunch.
  17. Mike May 4, 2018 at 3:07 pm #
    "Cinco de Drinko" actual LOL on that one... pure gold. :)
  18. Lucy May 4, 2018 at 5:03 pm #
    I've had a house cleaner for about 4 years and most people don't know. It's just my husband and me so I sort have that feeling of guilt as well. However, it came up at lunch the other day, and exactly like you said, 3 out of 4 of us had house cleaners! One of my co-workers said, my wife and I "invite someone to come clean our house." i thought that was so clever! Go for it!
  19. Elizabeth P May 4, 2018 at 6:54 pm #
    I just started watching Handmade's Tale (season 1) and have been interspersing Champions (Mindy Kaling's new show) for comedic relief. It's worked pretty well for helping me handle being horrified by Handmaid's Tale and I also just love Champions.
  20. Lori S. May 4, 2018 at 7:26 pm #
    I just started with a house cleaner every other week a few months ago. I fought it FOR-EV-ER. Serious guilt, all the same reasons as you. I do love coming home to a clean house - still trying to figure out how to handle the off weeks though!
  21. Spanish dictionary May 4, 2018 at 11:54 pm #
    Hire a house cleaner
  22. Wendy May 5, 2018 at 1:06 am #
    Do both. Kindle fires can have a time limit. Four year olds aren’t completely unreasonable (hahahahaha). No seriously. My four year old totally gets the time limit thing. The fire says, “times up for the day!” And he believes her. So you can have Aaron make busy bags and part of the driving can be that. The other part can be blissfully peaceful while the kids play educational games and apps or watch wild kratts and you have an adult conversation with your husband. Can’t imagine a long drive without them. First app to download...Monument Valley. Gorgeous, smart, improves analytical thinking. Brilliant. When my kids started playing that, I thought I was the smartest mom ever for getting on the kindle fire train.
  23. Rach May 6, 2018 at 12:55 pm #
    A house cleaner is very good but a on that note along the same subject as last Friday,,, don’t be afraid to ask for shoes off and welcome in the barefeet!!! Not sure if you read mine from last week but shoes have no place on inside the house sorry!!!! I stop right at the door barefoot!!! Glance down and just say “shoes “ please it not a big deal to ask and if they are not up on those pedicures!!! Oh well !! Is anyone else as insistent with running a barefoot home as me?? I would love to hear your insistent greetingls LOL
  24. Rach May 6, 2018 at 2:04 pm #
    Oh my!! Am I the only insistent barefooter on this blog !! Yikes maybe I should be quiet!!
    • Bev Weidner May 7, 2018 at 6:23 am #
      Naw, girl! Speak your mind. There are plenty of other shoe-less readers here in the group. But for me, just say no to bare feet. :)
      • Rach May 7, 2018 at 7:33 am #
        So you honestly don’t just love that feeling of slipping off shoes and peeling socks for that ahhh moment and paddle around barefoot huh ? Lol
  25. Jenn I May 6, 2018 at 11:05 pm #
    I've had a house keeper for 14 years. For 10 of those years I lived alone in a 2 bedroom apartment. She comes every other week. I would (and have) give up alcohol and eating out before I would give up my housekeeper. Do it.
  26. Bee May 7, 2018 at 8:50 am #
    GET. THE. KINDLES. I have a 6 year old and a 4 year old and in-laws that live hours away. Kindles are truly lifesavers and my children are not melting into puddles of electronically mind-numbed goo either. Everyone will survive and everyone will be happier.
  27. Jina May 7, 2018 at 8:51 am #
    me too had a house keeper for month and now she gone. Now found someone who comes every monday and friday. Its nice but cheap.
  28. sara May 7, 2018 at 5:08 pm #
    I love Schitt's Creek so much!! I cannot bring myself to watch Handmaids Tale though so I cannot say which is better. S Creek is a super enjoyable, easy- breezy watch! Also I treat myself to a monthly housecleaner- its my favorite day of the month even though I keep my house clean. There's something magical about them cleaning!
  29. Kathy H May 9, 2018 at 3:51 pm #
    You will probably think I am hopelessly old-fashioned, but as a mother of two boys, now 20 and 22, I would vote no for the kindles/iPads. Yes, it is a long drive for four-year-olds, but I think are other ways. We drove all the way out to California (from PA) and back in 2004 - the boys were 6 and 8 (I know, a bit older, but you know - BOYS.) We packed a cardboard box which sat in the middle back of our Explorer with age-approp. books to look at and read, coloring books, puzzle books, an Etch-a-Sketch, etc. I cut up shapes made of different colors of felt and got two large pieces of felt for them to make pictures - like a "flannel board" if you've ever heard of one of those. Actually - I made this for a trip when the boys were younger, and we took it along out west because it had worked so well on 7 & 8 hour car trips. Our best idea was "Books on CD" (we listened to The Wind in the Willows, Charlotte's Web, and Where the Red Fern grows - I'm sure there are many good ones for four-year-olds. We checked them out of our local library.) We also had a laptop on which they watched movies - so yes - we did have some screens. (Think Winnie the Pooh, Mary Poppins - old ones...but those might not be the best for your kiddies.) We gave them both sketch books and they drew pictures of places we went and also taped in postcards of the places we stopped. So...just some ideas. Plenty of stops and running around at highway rest areas, snacks, their own pillows and maybe a special new fleece blanket for each. I'm sure you'll have a grand time whatever you do!
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