Beer-Battered Fried Calamari Pizza

Babies and pizza! Not to be confused with babies IN pizza. Or babies ON pizza. Or baby pizza.

Beer-Battered Fried Calamari Pizza / Bev Cooks

Jess, I’ve been waiting months (years, CENTURIES . . . MILLENNIUMS) to tell you something of utmost vital importance. This is your virtual baby showeeeerrrr! (said like Oprah) Ashley and I came together and rounded up 9257345234 bloggers because we all love ya, love ya, and want some more of ya. And guess what we did, we trashed up our food for YOU! Crazy bunch, we are.

It’s no secret you’re a ridiculous source of happiness for many, many people. You offer a brand of side-splitting humor that rivals the best of ’em, a collection of obsessions that not only confuses the masses, but inspires them, and an eye for neon and glitter that I’m quite positive resulted in a rapid increase in sunglasses stock.

But to me, you’re insurmountably so much more.

But first, can we just look at this incredible graphic Ashley made for you? I mean look. Just look. Do you see all those sprinkles? Do you?

graphic

I love that you and I can take off our “funny girl” hats, and just be. In my darkest of dark eras, you kept me off the ledge, and when you turned 30 years ago, I kept you off that same ledge. Wait, was it the same one? Maybe it was the ledge next door, or the one across the street? I can’t remember. You’d brought wine.

Cliché as it may be, words cannot describe how excited I am that you’re soon going to birth either Natalie or Will’s future soul mate. Which, while we’re on the subject, in the future I’d like to make a request that you actually find out the sex of your child and tell us, because clearly my neurosis can’t deal with this.

So, to celebrate the coming of your own gremlin, I made a trashed up beer-battered deep fried calamari pizza with banana peppers and cheese and pizza sauce and a spicy creamy hot sauce drizzle! Because we all know how pregnant women and spicy food go hand in hand.

Oh they don’t? Oh.

Beer-Battered Fried Calamari Pizza / Bev Cooks

I love you to freaking death, Jess, and I can’t wait to meet your little poo-poo bear. DARN IT I TOLD MYSELF I WOULDN’T CRY.

Beer-Battered Fried Calamari Pizza:

What it took for two pizzas:

for the dough:

* 1 (1/4th oz) packet dry active yeast
* 3/4 cup warm water
* 1 Tbs. sugar
* 1 tsp salt
* 1/8 cup olive oil,
* 2 cups all-purpose flour, plus more for the work surface

for the calamari:

* 1 pound calamari rings
* 3 cups favorite seafood batter mix (or a mix of flour, cayenne, salt and pepper), divided
* 1 cup of beer
* 4 cups canola oil

the rest:

* 1 cup favorite pizza sauce
* a good handful sliced pepperoncini (banana peppers)
* 3 cups shredded fresh mozzarella (or a block is fine)
* minced parsley
* 1 lemon, zested
* 1/2 cup Greek yogurt
* 2 tsp hot sauce (like Tabasco)
* 2 tsp juice from the pepperoncini jar

Start your dough. Pour the warm water into a large bowl and add the yeast. Let sit for 5 minutes until it gets bubbly. Whisk in the sugar, salt and oil. Then add the two cups of flour. Mix until you get a soft gooey ball of dough. Remove the ball of dough from the bowl, wipe it out, place it back and brush with a little bit of olive oil. Cover with a clean kitchen towel and let sit for an hour, until doubled in size.

While the dough rests, start on your calamari. Bring the oil to a pipin’ 350 degrees in a straight-sided pan.

In a small bowl, combine 1 cup of the batter mix with the 1 cup of beer. Place the rest of the batter mix in another shallow dish. In a few small batches dredge the calamari rings through the beer batter, shake off any excess goo, then toss them around in the remaining dry mix.

Fry in batches until golden brown, draining on a plate with paper towels.

Preheat your oven to 400. Stick a pizza stone in there if you have one!

Divide the pizza dough into two balls and roll them out until you get a good 9 or 10-inch pizza. I can’t ever get mine round. I’m okay with it though. I’m rustic. Right? Never mind.

Spoon as much sauce as you like over each crust. Follow with a scattering of banana peppers and mozzarella cheese. Slide into the oven and bake for about 15 minutes, allowing the crust to brown and the cheese to bubble up with glory.

While the pizza is baking, mix together the yogurt, hot sauce and pepperoncini juice.

Remove from the oven and top with fried calamari, a healthy drizzle of the cream sauce, minced parsley and lemon zest. Serve with lemon wedges and get.on.that.already.

Beer-Battered Fried Calamari Pizza / Bev Cooks

And now to overwhelm (I mean shower!) you with way too much love to even handle. From all of us, to you. Muah.

trashed up salads

 

  1. Gimme Some Oven – Asian Broccoli Salad with Peanut Sauce
  2. The Lemon Bowl – Brussels Slaw with Tahini Dressing and Za’atar Crostini
  3. With Style & Grace – Kale Salad with Apple, Hazelnuts & Bacon

 

trashed up cocktails

 

  1. Dine & Dish – Hot Buttered Rum Cocktail
  2. Food For My Family – Cranberry Orange Dark and Stormy Cocktail
  3. Minimalist Baker – Bourbon Pumpkin Milkshakes
  4. Stylish, Stealthy & (sometimes) Healthy – Apple Cider Shandy
  5. A Spicy Perspective – Preggy Punch Mocktail
  6. Girl vs. Dough – Boozy Maple Peanut Butter Cup Milkshake
  7. Honestly Yum – Maple Bacon Pisco Sour
  8. Cookin Canuck – Pink Grapefruit Margaritas
  9. A Thought For Food – Mezcal Citrico Cocktail
  10. A House in the Hills – Pomegranate Rosemary Spritzer
  11. The Novice Chef – Ginger Bourbon Apple Cider
  12. Bran Appetit – Citrus Cider Punch Floats

 

trashed up burgers

 

  1. Edible Perspective – Meatloaf Veggie Burgers with Mashed Potatoes + Gravy
  2. The Little Kitchen – Salmon BLT Sliders with an Avocado Aioli & Brie
  3. Daisy At Home – Balsamic Beef Burger with Mac and Cheese
  4. Cookies & Cups – Candied Bacon Maple Cheddar Burger
  5. Climbing Grier Mountain – Trashed-Up Steak Burger with Chicken Fried Bacon & Dijon Gravy
  6. Dessert For Two – Bleu Cheese Burgers + Sweet Potato Fries
  7. Country Clever – Fig Rosemary Roast Chicken Brie Brussels Sprout Panini
  8. Foodie Crush – The Best Cheeseburger Soup
  9. Lady and Pups – Spicy Sambal Chicken Meatball Sub with Eggs
  10. Two Peas & Their Pod – Sweet Potato and Kale Grilled Cheese
  11. Bake Your Day – Ultimate Breakfast Sandwich

 

trashed up tacos

 

  1. Spoon Fork Bacon – Crunchy Ground Beef and Cheesy Tacos
  2. The Fauxmartha – Boozy Beef and Butternut Tacos
  3. With Food + Love – Harvest Hash Breakfast Tacos
  4. Mountain Mama Cooks – Crispy Kale and Brussels Sprout Tacos with Bacon
  5. Heather Christo – Bahn Mi Tacos with Spicy Sriracha Honey Sauce
  6. A Couple Cooks – Loaded Huevos Rancheros Tacos
  7. Fitnessista – San Diego Lobster Street Tacos

 

trashed up desserts

 

  1. Table for Two – Salted Caramel, Dark Chocolate, and Brown Butter Shortbread Bars with Sprinkles
  2. My Name is Yeh – Mini Vanilla Loaf Cakes, All Trashed Up
  3. Picky Palate – Pumpkin Spice Butterscotch Sprinkle Cupcakes
  4. Sprinkle Bakes – Cake Batter Confetti Cupcakes
  5. Averie Cooks – Easy Homemade Funfetti Cake with Vanilla Buttercream
  6. Sweet Phi – Trashed Up Shortbread Cookie Bars
  7. Love & Olive Oil – Loaded Junk Food Brownies
  8. Lauren’s Latest – Bakery Sugar Cookies
  9. Cookie + Kate – Peanut Butter, Banana, Honey and Oat Chocolate Chip Cookies
  10. Flourishing Foodie – Triple Layer Chocolate Cake with Salted Caramel Buttercream Frosting
  11. The Sugar Hit – Salted Caramel Popcorn Ice Cream Cake
  12. Hummingbird High – Breakfast Cereal Cake Donuts
  13. Top With Cinnamon – Triple Chocolate Vanilla Swirl Crumb Cake
  14. Bake at 350 – Chocolate Chip Cookie Ice Cream Sundaes
  15. Simple Bites – Lemon Layer Cake
  16. Bakerella – Baby Block Cake Pops
  17. She Wears Many Hats –  Chocolate Covered Grapefruit

 

trashed up pizza

 

  1. Bev Cooks – Beer Battered Fried Calamari Pizza
  2. Rachel Cooks – Apple and Chicken Sausage Pizza with Macaroni and Cheese Stuffed Crust
  3. Foodie With Family – Trashed Up Barbecue Turkey Pizza
  4. Shutterbean – Pesto Potato Bacon Pizza
  5. i am a food blog – Grilled Cheese Pizza
  6. My Life as a Mrs – Chili Cheese Dog Pizza
  7. Simply Scratch – Steak + Blue Cheese Pizza with Crispy Fried Shallots and Honey Balsamic Drizzle
  8. The Beeroness – Beer Cheese Tater Tot Pizza
  9. Yes I Want Cake – Roasted Pumpkin Pizza
  10. Two Red Bowls – Bacon Mashed Potato Pizza
  11. Dula Notes – Pork Bahn Mi Pizza
  12. Weelicious – Trashed Up Mexican Pizza Pockets
  13. Take a Megabite – Roasted Beet Pizza
  14. Hungry Girl Por Vida – Hard Cider Braised Pork with Sour Cherries and Cheesy Polenta
  15. Bakers Royale – Trash’d Street Tacos

 

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97 Responses to Beer-Battered Fried Calamari Pizza

  1. Sune Moolman November 4, 2014 at 4:22 am #

    Yay! Baby shower!
    This pizza looks fabulous! Beer battered fried calamari – bring.it.on!!

  2. Averie @ Averie Cooks November 4, 2014 at 5:00 am #

    Love this Bev and thank you for being our fearless leader and helping make such a massive shower go off without a hitch! You’re amazing!!! 🙂

  3. Sarah | The Sugar Hit November 4, 2014 at 5:00 am #

    Ugh, in case it hasn’t been said enough, thank you for organising this. Not only does Jess totally deserve a crazy invisible internet friends baby shower, but this list of recipes is basically my spirit animal now. So, thanks Bev and Ash!

  4. Sarah | The Sugar Hit November 4, 2014 at 5:02 am #

    Also, this pizza looks RIDICULOUS. There is not nearly enough calamari on pizza in my life.

  5. MB @ Bourbon and Brown Sugar November 4, 2014 at 5:27 am #

    Wow Bev… this is quite possibly the most amazing baby shower menu in the history of baby shower menus… can’t wait to read through every last blog post. I’m somewhat new to blogging, and am inspired by this invisible friend community. Oh, and love your inspired pizza as well!

  6. Rachel Cooks November 4, 2014 at 5:47 am #

    Thanks for organizing this amazing shower, Bev! You’re amazing, Jess is amazing, this pizza is amazing. I love today!

  7. Liz @ The Lemon Bowl November 4, 2014 at 6:04 am #

    I’ve been waiting to read this post. <3 I love it when you get all serious and take off your funny hat. Now hurry and put it back on.

  8. Liz @ Floating Kitchen November 4, 2014 at 6:40 am #

    This looks like the perfect way to celebrate the amazingness that is Jess!

  9. Jessica November 4, 2014 at 6:46 am #

    I can’t stop reading this over and over but really can’t read it again because I’m just going to melt. UGH YOU ARE MY LIFE. xoxoxo THANK YOU.

  10. Aimee @ Simple Bites November 4, 2014 at 7:23 am #

    Wowza!!! How come this wasn’t at my baby shower, some 85 years ago…?

    THANKS for organizing all this. It’s been a blast! Now where are those cocktails??

  11. Julie @ Table for Two November 4, 2014 at 7:28 am #

    I want this in my life!!!! Thanks for organizing this amazing shower!!

  12. brandi November 4, 2014 at 7:39 am #

    woah, woah, woah. bev. this looks so freaking good! it would be okay for breakfast, right?

  13. Maria November 4, 2014 at 7:40 am #

    Best shower EVER! Thanks again for organizing! xo

  14. Jenny Flake November 4, 2014 at 7:43 am #

    Pizza perfection! Such a fun baby shower today! xo

  15. Dani Meyer November 4, 2014 at 8:02 am #

    Amazing Bev!!! Such a great job organizing and this pizza. OMG. I neeeeed it. I’m starving now and its only 6 am.

  16. Brian @ A Thought For Food November 4, 2014 at 8:13 am #

    You and Ashley did an awesome job organizing this! GO YOU TWO!!! Also, you totally nailed this pizza. Can you please bring some over so we can have it for breakfast? Maybe with a mezcalita? It’s 12 o’clock somewhere.

  17. Ali | Gimme Some Oven November 4, 2014 at 8:27 am #

    Love this. Thanks for organizing the 2984092 bloggers for this. Cheers to Jessica!

  18. Ashley November 4, 2014 at 8:32 am #

    Such a sweet post!!!! LOVE IT!!! Ridiculously amazing pizza!!! xoxo

  19. Nicole November 4, 2014 at 8:43 am #

    This shower is so epic! I want this crazy pizza in my life!

  20. Pam November 4, 2014 at 9:29 am #

    This is awesome, but a lot of your links aren’t working 🙁 I REALLY want that Pesto potato pizza!

    • Bev Weidner November 4, 2014 at 9:40 am #

      I know! We’re updating the broken links as we speak.

  21. Jessica @ Golden Brown and Delicious November 4, 2014 at 9:57 am #

    it’s so freaking adorable how much love is in this post. you guys are amazing!!

  22. claire @ the realistic nutritionist November 4, 2014 at 10:08 am #

    I love love love this 🙂

  23. Cookin Canuck November 4, 2014 at 10:31 am #

    Thanks so much to you and Ashley for organizing this amazing shower. And that pizza is to die for!

  24. Laura @ Laura's Culinary Adventures November 4, 2014 at 10:39 am #

    This pizza looks amazing, unlike babies on pizza!

  25. Jackie {The Beeroness} November 4, 2014 at 11:34 am #

    You’re the best. And so is Jess. And so is this pizza. I’m in love with all three of you.

  26. cynthia November 4, 2014 at 11:39 am #

    This pizza is EVERYTHING. Thank you so so so much to you and Ashley for organizing this incredible shindig!!!!! Highlight of my week. (Also, high-five pizza paddle twin!)

  27. Shaina November 4, 2014 at 12:06 pm #

    This looks incredible. Thank you for hosting, and a huge congratulations to Jess!

  28. Joana (my gut feeling) November 4, 2014 at 12:30 pm #

    What an awesome idea!! It would be great to have a pinterest board with all these amazing trashed up recipes 😉 Congrats for hosting.

  29. Megan {Country Cleaver} November 4, 2014 at 1:29 pm #

    I wish there was an appropriate emoticon to really showcase the expression on my face for this pizza… *jaw drops*

  30. Lauren @ Climbing Grier Mountain November 4, 2014 at 1:56 pm #

    My hat is off to Ashley and you for herding 2356789 food bloggers into one smashing virtual baby shower!! So much love out there today! Congrats to Jessica!!

  31. heather @french press November 4, 2014 at 2:11 pm #

    such a sweet, and funny post and that pizza – heaven

  32. Natalie November 4, 2014 at 2:14 pm #

    Reading all of these virtual shower posts is making me positively giddy. What a wonderful, wonderful idea! (And that pizza? Get out of town. YUM.)

  33. K / Pure & Complex November 4, 2014 at 4:28 pm #

    Wow, this pizza simply looks divine. I can’t even talk because my mouth is already ready to taste it. Wonderful post

  34. Stephanie @ Girl Versus Dough November 4, 2014 at 7:39 pm #

    This pizza is my soulmate. Thanks so much to you and Ash for organizing such a fun shower!

  35. Dan Martin November 4, 2014 at 8:04 pm #

    This post and the replies are all I need to have faith in humanity on a bad day. All of you are incredible people.

  36. Laurie {Simply Scratch} November 4, 2014 at 8:04 pm #

    BEVVV! First, THANK YOU for hosting such an amazing virtual shower, you and Ashley are the bestest. This pizza… I’m in love. So gorgeously trashy… I love it.

  37. Mary @ The Kitchen Paper November 4, 2014 at 8:36 pm #

    Oh man. You are a good friend! AND a terrific pizza trasher-upper! Is that a thing? I hope so. It’s your calling. This looks damn good!

  38. Christina @ The Beautiful Balance November 5, 2014 at 7:20 am #

    This is so perfect and I loved reading your post, you are so sweet!

  39. Phi @ The Sweetphi Blog November 5, 2014 at 8:50 am #

    Thank you for organizing this beautiful event Bev! I was so happy to be a part of it! Can I just say that I teared up and shed big crocodile tears reading this post! I just can’t get enough of the beautiful way you described your love for Jess and her upcoming adventure into motherhood! And baby pizza? Now that sounds interesting…lol. But really, this beer battered fried calamari pizza sounds and looks out of this world delicious!

  40. Laura | five focus November 5, 2014 at 9:03 am #

    Such an incredible idea to throw the virtual shower…what an amazing community!

  41. Cassie November 5, 2014 at 10:22 am #

    This is so sweet and heartfelt and I love the pizza!! It’s so fun celebrating friends with friends!

  42. Jennifer @ Show Me the Yummy November 5, 2014 at 12:33 pm #

    What a nice gesture to put this together for her! And this pizza?! You gotta be kidding me. Amazing!!!

  43. Emily @ Life on Food November 5, 2014 at 2:34 pm #

    jess is amazing! this pizza is amazing! and I love this virtual baby shower! a gazillion amazing recipes!

  44. Daisy at Home November 5, 2014 at 3:45 pm #

    This pizza looks CRAY… in the best, over the top, most delicious way possible!

  45. Lisa [With Style & Grace] November 5, 2014 at 4:04 pm #

    you’re such an awesome host!! I love this, all of it. and this pizza, dear gawd, just pass me the whole thing.

  46. bridget {bake at 350} November 5, 2014 at 5:26 pm #

    This pizza is perfect!!! AND, this is the BEST baby shower I’ve ever attended. 😉

  47. Sarah @ People,Places&Plates November 5, 2014 at 9:40 pm #

    I know this is a really overused phrase in the online food world….but seriously these are all my favourite things….

  48. Kristin @ Tasty Joy November 6, 2014 at 7:20 am #

    A virtual baby shower: what a fantastic idea! I’m new to the blogosphere and wish I had been around a bit longer to take part. I can’t wait to try the calamari pizza. It looks absolutely scrumptious!

  49. Carol at Wild Goose Tea November 10, 2014 at 1:55 pm #

    What a fab pizza—-just flat out fab. That goes for the shower too. I am smiling as I am typing!

  50. Sommer @ASpicyPerspective November 12, 2014 at 3:44 pm #

    I want this pizza for dinner tonight!

  51. Kanmani November 25, 2014 at 9:46 pm #

    oh it’s perfect .I like it very much 🙂

  52. Patrick February 7, 2015 at 9:57 pm #

    Pizza and calamari – just the two of my most favorite things. I can die happy after eating this pizza.

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