Pizza with Fig Preserves, Caramelized Onions and Chicken Sausages

I got my computer back! Thrice now.

I’m terrified to talk about it because I’m afraid it will send the fragile little muthuh back into cardiac arrest. So I’ll just whisper it . . .  y a a a y.

Okay so pizza! Of course. Why not. It’s full-blown chilly outside and my belly doth swelleth.

Speaking of, my belly button is really starting to take on a new personality these days. I have a close friend that HATES things like belly buttons, the words ‘moist’ and ‘pork’, loose wet hairs on shower walls, and so on. So every few days I delight in sending her text updates of what my belly button looks like. I make sure to let her know if it looks like a little mouth going, “ooooo!” Or if it has any teeny veins around it making it appear like a mini fiery purplish sun. Or of course if anything has fallen out of it like dental floss or half a cookie. She’s terrified of the day that it completely pops out. As in, won’t even look at me. Literally puts her hands over her eyes and gasps, “No! No noononono!”

It’s like, my fuel in life.

What was I saying?

Pizza! Let me tell you something pretty pimp about this pizza. The time it takes you to preheat the oven is the same amount of time it takes to sauté the chicken sausages. Gold star right there.

The rest of the meal is pantry staples. Sort of. The fig spread came in a jar. The caramelized onions were leftovers from the day before. The cheese is a duh situation. The pizza dough was from Trader Joe’s. Gold star gold star gold star gold star.

We’re cuatro-ing that gold star ish, yo.

It’s a pretty sweet pizza, and I don’t mean posh. I mean it IS posh. Super poshy. Probably the poshiest ever. Let me start over.

It’s like dessert sweet. The syrupy figs, the candy onions, the sweet sausages, the nectarous tears of delight from graphic belly button text messages to my brittle bosom buddy.

You’re over me talking about my belly button, aren’t you?

Got it.

Oh hey! Make this pizza.

Pizza with Fig Preserves, Caramelized Onions and Chicken Sausages:

What it took for 2 pizzas:

* 1 pound (premade!) pizza dough (I used Trader Joe’s), divided in half and rolled out to about two 8-inch circles
* 1 cup jarred fig preserves, or fig spread (or less if you find you don’t need that much)
* 1 cup caramelized onions (I used leftovers that I’d made the day before, but if you don’t have any, just sauté a couple of thinly sliced white onions on low with a Tbs. of brown sugar and a little oil until they’re candy-like, about 45 minutes)
* 2 – 3 chicken sausages (flavor up to you!), sliced thinly and sautéed in a little oil until browned on both sides
* 2 cups shredded mozzarella cheese
* thinly sliced chives for garnish

Preheat oven (and a pizza stone) to 400.

Top your dough with the fig spread, onions, chicken sausages and half the cheese. Slide onto the pizza stone and bake until the cheese is browned and bubbly, and the dough is cooked through, 10-17 minutes. (depending on your oven) Repeat with remaining pizza.

Garnish with chives!

(I sure do have a lot of parentheses in this post.)

(I can stop at any time!)

(The end.)

*belly button sold separately