I see your traditional chili and I RAISE YOU THIS MUTHA. Chili powder? Zilch. Cumin? Nada. Can of beans soaked in chili whatever whatever? Naw. THIS. This is epic. Totally unexpected. Beyond exceptional. Exquisitely special. And the chili’s pretty good, too. BAHA HA HAH A hha h a a haha ha a a hahah aaa. […]
Oh no we di’iiiint! Surprise, Jenny! I made you eggs. Get it? Like, the eggs in your uterus that became a human? AND they’re deviled, since you’re having a boy human. I MEAN RIGHT? Ya know, I’m really diggin’ on the idea of a virtual baby shower like this, because it eliminates the possibility of […]
DING DONG. The doorbell rings. The sun has set. I’m in egg nog-stained yoga pants and my sock bun doth saggeth. Gripping the 14 heart attacks scrambling to escape my chest bone, I walk over to the kitchen window and peek out to see a UPS truck zipping away, leaving me with a gigantic cardboard […]
Okay, before you read the title of this post, break out into a clammy sweat and lunge for the browser exit, hear me out! I’m betting that if you’re like most homo sapiens, the thought of eating sardines out of a tin can is equivalent to being tarred and feathered in the middle of the […]
