Frrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrreeeeederrerereree! If you were a mall, what stores would you have? That’s an odd question, let me revamp that. Let’s say you were the PLAZA. The KC Plaza. And you were getting bought by new owners, and they needed a list of stores to bring to the Plaza, what would those stores be besides Aesop, […]
Frrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrit’s beginning to look a lot . . .like . . . I do love December 1st. It’s officially the OFFICIAL time of Christmas officialness. (I’m good with words.) There’s a different kind of magic in the air today, don’t you think?! The lights are twinkling in the streets, the elf is back (ugh), the […]
Frrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrri need help. (shocked, you are?) We need to discuss carpet cleaner. Like a rug cleaner. Like the one directly below my house shoes right in this instant permeating dog piss up into my nostril caverns like a middle finger of doom. (I feel great why do you ask?) Charlie knows better, yes. But she’s […]
Frrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrah! tah! sa! ma! da! You want to know what else I can’t stand? (I’m feeling fine! Why do you ask?) SEEING SOCKS. Like out of a tennis shoe. Poking out like a little nosy turtle head. Nerp. I know it’s trendy. I know it’s cool with the Gen Z, but they’re wrong. I can’t […]
Frrrrrrrrrrrreeeeeedeeeeleeeemeemmmeeemmemee. What kind of retinol do you use? Like at night. What brand? What percentage? What formula? What voodoo potion of yesterlore of the ancient tales of yonder? Is that the way you say it? I ask because I was in the middle of a little pumpkin enzyme facial yesterday, and the lady goes, “Honey […]
Frrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrace day tomorrow!!! (!!!!!) . (!) I’m feeling ready. I’m feeing great. I have a teeny weeny two miles left to run today and it’s an official wrap on half marathon training. I cannot believe it. Remember when I started this back in June?! Bananas. The hardest part for me during this training was reaching […]
Frrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! I need to get back into pies! Lit-rally hadn’t planned on typing those words until they just came out of my fangies. Tell me something, and this is going to sound so silly, but (and I could google this but you’re cuter) are chess pies (like the word CHESS) the word I’m looking for […]
Frrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrit! it! ay! yay! it! what! Do you change your skin care routine in the fall and winter? I just saw a New York Times article in my newsletter this morning about that very thing. I clicked on it but I haven’t read it yet. I just saw the words “pulled from the lipid barrier” […]
Frrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrreyeeeeeee! Natalie gave me her Christmas list three nights ago. HER CHRISTMAS WISH LIST. I was in bed reading. It was like, 9:15pm and I was this close to turning out my bedside lamp, and in walks Miss Prissy List all, “Okay here it is. And it’s numbered so it’s easier to read. And I […]
Frrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrree-dah. Who else has been completely hooked (swindled?) by the purple toothpaste ads all over Pinterest and Instagram? Have you seen those? Please tell me not to add to cart. Please. It has to be a lie. The ads are like, a girl putting the toothpaste on one yellowish tooth and letting it sit for […]
