Frooo hoooo hoo hoo ha ha ha HA AH AHAH AAAA HA HA HAAAAiday. Let’s tell ghost stories! Oh don’t give me that look. You know your late Aunt Freda’s been snoopin’ around the foot of your bed at 3am again and you’re itching to tell someone. With Halloween a few days away (<–said like […]
FaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaRIDAY. Dudes. Oak mites. Also known as Satan’s ELVES. Have you heard of this obnoxiously itchy plague happening in the Midwest right now? Better yet, do you have bites all over your body and you have no idea what they’re from or how they got there, because they don’t exactly look like mosquito bites, or […]
F R I D A Y Y Y A D D D I I I R R R F R I D A Y Y Y A D D D I I I R R R F R I D A Y. (Yes that’s the same mum as last week, but fuller. More full. More […]
FREEDEEDOO. FRIIDIIDII. FRODOTEAUX. FROTODEAUX. (name that movie. sort of.) I have the craziest story for you. This happened to me seriously a year ago, and I’m just now getting around to telling you. (you’re like, WHY START NOW.) I’m mainly telling you because I want to know how YOU would have handled this. Because I […]
Fridayyyyyyyyyyeeeeeeeeeeiiiiiiiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeyyyyyyyyyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. Why doesn’t Chipotle have queso? It just dawned on my brain hole the other day – Chipotle doesn’t have queso. How are we living in a world where Chipotle does not have queso? I think that would be a BOSS move for them. A KILLER move. (But not a boss killer move. Just…making that […]
FRA LA LA LA LAAAAAA DAY DA Y DAY DAY. Okay, remember how obsessed I got with my mini horse pube broom eyebrows a while back? You’re like, “no but thanks for that lovely image.” WELL, I ended up going to Ulta (wait, Ultra? Ulta. Ulba? Ulla? Uvula?) and had an eyebrow specialist go bonkers […]
FRID-EEEEEEEEY. FRID-HEEEEEEY. FRID-HAAAAAAY. friday. Do you think those ear wax candle thingies are a myth? A legend? A hoax? A ripoff? Because, you guys. I cannot hear anymore. My hearing is gone. All gone. Wiped away forever. Between my kids constantly screaming down my eardrums, my dog barking at the mailman and any other speck […]
fFfFFFFrRrRRRRiIiIIIIdDdDDDDaAaAAAAyYyYYYY. (<-can you find the code?) Omg. OMG. o.m.g. Did you guys ever watch The Jinx? I know, I know – I’m super late to the party. We finally watched it this week. Finished last night. My jaw is still nowhere near my face and it’s starting to look weird. (also, I promise no spoilers […]
FRILLY DILLY DAY-Y DOO. You know how in your Gmail, when you order something from most online stores, it has that little “Track Package” button in the SUBJECT LINE of the email? And you can just click that handy highway and it takes you directly to UPS or Fedex or Snails ‘R Us or whatever? […]
Fu-REE DEEEEEEEEEEEEE. Can we please talk about Peppa Pig for like half a second? And no more? Because I want to die? WHAT IS WITH THIS SHOW. A) I have maj issues with it. Sure sure. It’s adorable and whatever. Kids love it. My kids love it. They giggle. The pigs giggle. They learn. Everyone’s […]
