Friday Flotsam


Snowy Street

Do your eyeballs ever wiggle in their sockets?

You know like, when you sort of rest your eyes, and they just start boogieing on their own? It’s the weirdest feeling! I can’t decide if I hate it or want to cut a rug with them.

It doesn’t happen often. Probably less than 10 times in my entire life, but when it does happen, it’s wiiiiigs me out. You can’t MAKE them wiggle. They decide to wiggle themselves. And the wiggle doesn’t last long. Two seconds tops. There might be a strand of wiggles. It might be a single wiggle. But it’s a wiggle.

It’s not up and down. It’s side to side. And very minimal. At least for me.

O M G I J U S T L O O K E D I T U P .

Apparently it’s Nystagmus. Apparently it’s an abnormality in the brain and apparently I’m going to die.

I don’t think I have it. Like I said, it’s only happened a tiny baby elf handful of times in my whole life.

I’m going to lie down.

Gremlins making cinnamon ornaments

I’ll lie down later.

Where do you stand with your Christmas shopping?! Are you a procrastinator, and still have the whole bloomin’ loot to go?

I’ve been done for a while, but of course yesterday I was out doing some everyday-life shopping, and I found these weird little candy maker thingies at an Asian food market. I have no idea how they work, but I’m intrigued! And they were only $2.29 each. Boom.

One is an orange owl, and one is a pink pig. Inside each see-through plastic belly are little containers of jelly. I think. They’re like, gooey tablets in a weird substance. Do you even know what I’m talking about?

WAIT. I just grabbed the pig and did some further investigating. It’s not a candy maker at all. It’s a piggy bank. HAHAHAHA. With little packets of strange fruit jelly inside.

Okay, I get it now.

This post is awful.

Snowy Pots

Listen to this!

Yesterday morning I was grinding my coffee beans, like norm. When all of a sudden, my grinder started SMOKING AND SLUDGING AND CURSING. The motor slowed waaay down, and smoke started coming out the back of the machine, where the cord comes out. Sounded like a broken truck muffler on an abandoned dirt road outside of Las Vegas in the middle of the night.

I ripped the cord out of the socket and inhaled the STANK. You guys, what if that ish blew up in my face!?


So scary.

SO THEN. (and this is the worst part) I had to put the half-ground coffee beans in a mortar and pestle, and hand grind them.

My coffee SUCKED yesterday. Ba-leeeeew.

So then I went to Target and bought ground coffee because I didn’t want to think about a new grinder until after Christmas. Today’s coffee is much better.

Thanks for sticking with me through this wretched post.

Nat in a hamper

Gilmore Girls update!

(also, spoiler spoiler spoiler)

LANE AND ZACK GOT MARRIED. They’re like, 7 years old, but whatever.

I go in and out with the way I feel about Zack. (shocker, I know.) I’ve always loved his gentle slackerness, his dramatic, slurry vocal cadence, and the slight Kurt Cobain vibe he emits. But his HAIR in some episodes just kills me. When he had bangs during that one era? No. Terrible. It needs to be blonder, longer, shaggier, with a beanie on top. My late ’90s crush hair is showing.

Logan and Rory are . . . okay.

Oh oh oh!! She went to Philly and surprised Jess at his art show! And they KISSED and I died inside. Then she told him she was in love with Logan and I barfed inside. Then she left him standing there and I slapped her inside.

I’m almost at the end of season 6! I hear that the writers change in season 7 and that it heads to the south pole. I’m so curious!

I’ll keep you posted.

You’re like, PLEASE DO NOT.

Dried Oranges in a Snowy Window

Weekend plans? Bahahahahahha! Just kidding.

Tell me though – do you travel? Are you staying home? We’re staying home this year (*clap*clap*clap*clap*), but we have a lot of family coming up starting today through New Years Eve. I’m super pumped for everything, EXCEPT: I don’t have Christmas morning breakfast figured out. Do you? What will you prepare? I want something comforting and savory, but not a nuclear gut bomb of regret. Or strange piggy bank jelly packets. Halp!

On that note, I won’t be posting any recipes next week, but I will be back for Friday Flotsam. I have a lot I want to say to you (surprise, surprise), but I’ll save my cheese platter for next week.

Have a woooonderful Christmas break, everyone! I’ll end with a Christmas quiz:::

What was the name of Rudolf the Red-Nosed Reindeer’s girlfriend?



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11 Responses to Friday Flotsam

  1. Michelle December 23, 2016 at 8:13 am #
    Clarice! Like in a sweet "My name's Clarice, hi." kind of way. Not in a "Well, Clarice – have the lambs stopped screaming?" Hannibal Lector kind of way. ;)
    • Bev Weidner December 23, 2016 at 8:29 am #
      HAHAHAH! I think of that EVERY.SINGLE.TIME. (p.s. miss you! xoxo)
  2. Lindsay December 23, 2016 at 8:18 am #
    Clarice!!! I found a copy of Rudolph with Korean subtitles, and have played it for all my classes this week!! They loved it, and I got paid to peruse Instagram! Wooo! Teacher slacking for the win! Merry Christmas Weidner family! Y'all are the bees knees!
  3. Tillie December 23, 2016 at 8:21 am #
    Wishing a very happy holiday to you and your family!
  4. Grace December 23, 2016 at 9:20 am #
    "Hello, Clarice." (sorry, not sorry) From a diehard OG Gilmore girls fan, I say, go into Season 7 with an open mind! I may be in the minority, but it's not as terrible as people say. In fact, there's a lot in it that I love. I think the new writers/directors tried really hard to stay true. Maybe more so than the new revival... But enough about that until you've watched it. Merry Christmas!
  5. Erin H December 23, 2016 at 10:26 am #
    You know, everyone blames the season 7 writers for the suckiness of that season (and it's not completely awful by any means.. just not the same as say Season 1-4), but I feel like the Sherman-Palladions set up that failure in season 6. I mean Luke not telling Lorelai about April? That was just ridiculousness. I always felt like they changed the whole tone of the show in season 6. When I rewatch (which is more often then I should admit) I generally stop after season 5. Also I know Bev doesn't approve, but Team Logan all the way. ha. Although watching Jess on This is Us makes me lean a little more towards Team Jess. ha.
    • Erin H December 23, 2016 at 10:28 am #
      also that should say Palladino not Palladion. Good grief.
  6. Ssrah Wibowo December 23, 2016 at 10:31 am #
    Are they Lychee jellies?! Like jello with a couple chunks of the fruit in the middle? We buy them at our Asian grocer. Your kiddos will love them. And a fun container for later. Enjoy!
  7. Heather December 23, 2016 at 2:25 pm #
    The exact same thing with the coffee grinder happened to me about 6 months ago. It sounded awful, slowed to a stop and was smoking, I then also tried a mortar and pestle! A little freaky and a lot sucky!
  8. Christine December 23, 2016 at 2:33 pm #
    For Christmas morning you cannot go wrong with Christmas Morning Wife Saver . You prep it the night before and pop it in the oven for an hour. Link below. It's an Alberta thing, but power of it is legend throughout the land!! We cannot celebrate Christmas without it!
  9. Jamily Fuller December 24, 2016 at 2:17 pm #
    We're doing a crepe bar for Christmas morning! I'm making the batter tonight so it's ready for tomorrow and then just putting out fruit and NUTELLA. Plus I made cinnamon rolls today so I'm sure some of those will be eaten tomorrow too!

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