farrrrr EEE DEEEEEE. FELICITY’S HAIR. (I’m jumping right in.) She cut it. Yes this news is 18 years old. Remember, I was living under a giant (indie) rock back then. No TV, fresh out of college, starting my banking career, playing in a band, short bleached blonde hair, cut-up men’s Dickies in my wardrobe. SO […]
Archive | Friday Flotsam
Friday Flotsam
fridAAAAAAAYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYAAAYAY. Do you want to hear a story about how I’m the worst mom alive? Of course you do, you live for this stuff. Now personally, this story will go down as one of my most proud parental moments, even though it most likely scarred Natalie for life. Listen, it’s my duty to instill the […]
Friday Flotsam
Fr iday. So the other day I was texting with Jess. Not to be confused with JESS. One I salivate for, the other I salivate with. No no, Jess – my maj homegirl. My neurotic partner in crime. The only other person who uses as many exclamation points and all caps in a text as […]
Friday Flotsam
fa adf asfjal sdf f f as f f f ff f FRIDAY. You know what makes me bonkers? (you’re like, everything ever in the history of ever?) DUVETS. And duvet COVERS. And COMFORTERS. Why do all these words exist? Why isn’t it just – BEDSPREAD? When I was growing up, we always called it […]
Friday Flotsam
f RIDDDDDDD a a a a a a a a a a a a a AY. I NEED MORE ZEN. Hold on, sorry. Let me try that again. I need more zen. Contrary to popular belief, I’m not the most calm person in the world. I know you probably find that hard to believe, given […]
Friday Flotsam
FRIDAAAAAAAAAA y. Listen to this dream I had… It’s so weird, you guys. I’m almost nervous to tell you! But maybe you can help me dissect it, and together we can figure out exactly what is so defective with my noggin. So I was at this . . . courtyard-type of […]
Friday Flotsam
ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffRIDAY. I FINISHED GILMORE GIRLS. Waaaaaaaah. (also, maj spoilers!) Well, I finished the series, not the revival. So, technically I still have six more hours of Lorelai and Rory and Paris and Luke and Jess and Dean and Logan (gross) and Miss Patty and Babette and Kirk and errrbody else. Wait! I heard Sookie’s not […]
Friday Flotsam
f r i day. I accidentally bought flavored coffee so I’m extra murdery right now. WHO MAKES FLAVORED COFFEE? WHY? Why would someone do that to coffeeeeee?! The greatest body fuel of all time! (never mind water, leafy greens, all berries, whole grains, and other yawn-a-licious stuff like that.) But coffee! COFFEE. What is this, […]
Friday Flotsam
FRI LA LA LA LAAAA LA LA LA DAY. Do your eyeballs ever wiggle in their sockets? You know like, when you sort of rest your eyes, and they just start boogieing on their own? It’s the weirdest feeling! I can’t decide if I hate it or want to cut a rug with them. It […]
Friday Flotsam
Friddledeedeeeeeeeee! I WITNESSED A BREAK-IN. And it was the weirdest, I didn’t even know it’s what I was seeing. I mean, I watched a nice SUV drive up to my neighbor’s house, saw a dude get out and walk up to their front door, watched him sort of look around, and then . . . […]