Friday Flotsam

FRRRRRRRRRRRRamalamadingdong.

I have many things to discuss today, all of which are . . . ahem, of equal importance (you’re like, yeah right), but we HAVE to start with Taylor’s new song. It’s only mandatory. Have you heard it? How many times have you listened so far, besides 400 million? And when do you plan to see the movie? (ASH, we have to figure this out)

The song is nothing but emotional wreckage perfection. I saw on Reese Witherspoon’s IG yesterday (and you probably saw it, too) that Swift wrote the song while she was recording Folklore (when she read the book) which gives this old-world haunted feel to it and obviously sends me spiraling even further. They only used instruments that were alive (alive?) AROUND – that’s it, around during that era. It’s spooky and downcast and beautiful and ethereal and painful and wonderful. I’ll never listen to anything else for the rest of my life. (until she releases something else, duh)

Sorry, Aaron.

Listen to this.

(mom, skip this part)

The other day Will looked me straight in the eye with this little knowing smirk and he said to me, “Mom, what if we changed out the SK in Skittles and changed it to SH and the whole bag tasted like poop.”

Me, “Like shittles?” (trying to stifle all the laughs in my gut because o.m.g. that is genius.)

Will, “You said a bad word! Mom said a bad wooord!”

Me, “No I didn’t, I said shittles. Like shih tzu or shiitake.”

Will, “So can I say it?”

Me, “No. . . .Maybe.”

Shittles. I will now be using the word shittles for any cursing needs for the rest of my life.

You’re welcome to use it, too, for a small fee.

Yesterday I had a mole removed right under my clavicle (psa: get your yearly skin scans, yo!) and while it didn’t appear harmful to the doc, I went ahead and asked her to remove it because it looked like a roly-poly with measles just taking a chill little stroll up my chest.

So it’s gone.

Except last night when I peeked under the bandaid it now looks like a withered up, petrified crater hole near Roswell, New Mexico.

LOOK I KNOW IT’S BEEN ONE DAY.

And I know I’m supposed to wash it today, add more vaseline and change out the bandage for the next 5ish days. But what if it looks cratery for the rest of time? Shittles, you guys, this could be bad.

Do you have any mole-removal-scar-healing tips? Tell me while I listen to Carolina again.

I’m ready when you are.

Okay I have another Unpopular Opinion that I need to share with you all.

This one is probably delicate. So many say it. So many willingly type out the words. Like, on purpose. It’s mostly read and heard in the wild, like on Facebook or Instagram, when someone is getting married or celebrating an anniversary. And my soul barfs every time.

It’s when people say, “this thing called life.”

Or, “this crazy thing called life.”

It’s like, the FIRST person who typed out the words, “So happy blah blah blah to do this thing called life.” – okay. Fine. But no one else can. Not one single person else. It had its moment, and that moment is now over. Let’s not say that anymore, please. It’s horrifically hokey.

Agree? Disagree? Give me your most current Unpopular Opinion because I will not be left out on Catty Island alone.

Weekend plans?

I’m hosting my school mom friends tonight! And of course two things, because you know me and weather: it’s going to thunderstorm from 8am to noon, which will keep me indoors and unable to do all that weeding that you see I need to get to up there. AND THEN it gets butt-hot and swamp-mouth-muggy by the time my friends show up. Well shittles. (I’m still so excited and will you show you every little food and style detail later on today! Starting with this jazzy party playlist. That’s right.)

From this week, in case you ignored me completely::: French-Inspired Pasta Salad! Yogurt based and zingy to the max. Plus a how-to video! Also this Avocado Cucumber Salsa stuffed with nuts and seeds and it’s DELISH. And a video on that one, too! Lots of exclamation points you had to deal with just now, so if you need a moment, I get it.

Next week it’s all books and music, so pony up, pigeon.

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13 Responses to Friday Flotsam

  1. Kristin June 24, 2022 at 8:27 am #
    Ok, Will is a genius. I LOVE that. I mean the name, not the flavor suggestion. I have had a biopsy crater and a chunk of the tip of my finger lost in a ginger slicing incident heal without craters. I think you'll be ok. Agree with you on "this thing called life" even though I don't think I've ever heard anyone use it. IDK if this will be an unpopular opinion, but I am so freaking over "it is what it is". This one probably WILL be unpopular, but I also hate the cutesy wedding name hashtags, and I REALLY hate choreographed wedding dances. Oh, and I super really hate that my mom LOVES them, and sends me videos of them. Going to a family wedding on July 1, and have my fingers crossed for no choreography. I don't think my sil could keep it quiet, so we're probably safe. I am hoping the t-storms move out before the recycling truck comes, because I will be gone for trash day next week, and I really don't want 3 weeks of recycling piling up.
  2. FlwrPwrChick June 24, 2022 at 8:30 am #
    For your scar prevention. Neosporin the hell out of it. When pink and healed use Mederma scar cream. Key is consistently using it. I have zero scars from my gall bladder surgery. I don’t usually heal well. Surgeon told me this. Do not stop. It takes tie. 3–6 mos. Y husband did this too from mole removal. Consistency is key.
  3. Laura Lee June 24, 2022 at 9:18 am #
    I am not a mole person so I don't know about removals but I may have to have half my thyroid removed soon so definitely interested in scar therapies! I'd hate for my neck to look like shittles.
  4. Mary June 24, 2022 at 9:39 am #
    Agree on “this thing called life”! And can we add “beyond” and “did not disappoint”?!! Have a great weekend!
  5. Jess June 24, 2022 at 10:13 am #
    I'm loving shittles! Definitely going to be using that one. Also.....I absolutely agree with "this thing called life". Stop it! It's neither necessary nor cute. Looking forward to the food party pictures.
  6. Marielle June 24, 2022 at 10:13 am #
    And add "#blessed" to the list!!
  7. Rebekah June 24, 2022 at 10:28 am #
    Well, shittles, I’m gonna go ahead and agree with you regarding this thing called life. Be original and use your own words or don’t. That’s probably even better
  8. Nancy June 24, 2022 at 11:02 am #
    I know you can't really congratulate Will on his new word but I think he deserves it :). I kinda love it!
  9. Deb June 24, 2022 at 11:21 am #
    Your mole will heal. I had a skin tag removed. They just cut it off! Had a crater hole and it filled in and disappeared.
  10. Robin June 24, 2022 at 12:31 pm #
    So many mole removal stories here...some are craters forever and some disappear all on their own. I know, not helpful AT. ALL.
  11. Jane June 25, 2022 at 9:51 am #
    Well, #1–Shittles is definitely my new favorite word! And #2–besides the other good advice, please make sure you always keep sunscreen on that mole crater! That will for sure help to keep it from scarring. Have a great week!💖
  12. HH June 25, 2022 at 5:52 pm #
    Prince is the only person allowed to say "this thing called life". Permanently and forever.
  13. Jen June 27, 2022 at 5:21 pm #
    Shittles is probably the greatest thing I've heard in a long time and I intend to use it on the regular. Secondly, I agree wholeheartedly on "this thing called life", it's in every single anniversary post I see lately. I will also go on record, and fully accept all the shunning, and add "to the moon and back" to that list. Every mom on my FB feed uses it for every kid's birthday, for their husbands birthday or in the same anniversary post with the other bad saying... It needs to stop. Lastly, I had surgery a few months ago and my physical therapist recommended a product called "Scar Away". You wear it at night, it's a washable and reusable silicone bandage of sorts. Not sure how it works, but it really helped fade the scar and smooth it out.

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