FRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRalloweeeeeeeen! Let’s start with the obvious. What’s your favorite, F A V O R I T E Halloween candy? Look, this is permission for you to get ultra trashy with it. Because there is no “good” Halloween candy. Yet, we all know there’s definitely the “good” Halloween candy. Tell me what that is for you. […]
FRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR i d a y y y y y z z z z u u h h ! Have you ever noticed book carryovers? Because it happens to me ALL THE TIME. All.the.time. Like for instance, I’ll finish a book, then start a book, and there’s some bizarre commonality to them. A name (which is […]
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFare you ever nervous how I’ll end this? POLL: What do we think about Pajama Day at school? Okay, as I pose this question, you must know – I don’t care one way or the other. The kids love it (for the most part), they think it’s funny (for the most part), and it makes […]
FrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrRRRRROCTOber! I have to have a colonoscopy. (oh, you needed a warning?) A colonoscopy. A butt hose. I have to do that thing. Why, you ask? Well, it wasn’t the call I’d expected yesterday morning from my doctor after waiting a couple of weeks for the poop-in-the-bucket results. (my mom is having a legit heart […]
FRRRRRRRRRRRRRReeleeweeseepee! I have THEE most major announcement of all time. Biggest of my career. Of adulthood. OF MY LIFE. We’re thinking about signing up for the neighborhood fall leaf pickup this year. I know! Can you believe it?! This is HUGE. I’m a product of my father, you see, and not one to pay for […]
Frrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrroop! You know what my problem is? My entire problem, I have it figured it out. Know what it is? (you’re like, “you mean we have to choose?”) This is my problem: I don’t use enough Saran Wrap. I don’t pull enough out of the box the first go around. I never pull enough. Never. […]
FRRRRRRRRRRRRRR i d a a a a a a a a a h! I just had this INTENSE dream that I need to tell you about. It was wild. And I just woke up from it. Like an hour ago. Depending on when you read this internet blog URL website post. Listen to this: I […]
FRRRRRRRRRRRamlamdampam! Let me see if I understand this correctly. A cicada egg baby is born like, on the ground? Is that it? Then it climbs down into the ground through a tiny dirty hole and stays there for seventeen entire years. Long enough to watch every season of Grey’s Anatomy. THEN, they crawl back out […]
FRRRRRRRRRRRRRitz! ay! iday! Our monarch caterpillar ATE ITS OWN HEAD OFF. It did! Listen, this sounds wonky do, I know. But it happened. Literally happened. And I mean literally as in literally. We walked in to check on our one chrysalis and two baby caterpillars. (I forgot to tell you, we’re raising more. We are. […]
FRRRRRRRRRRRieeeeuuuuuuumuuuuday! (<–?) I’m sorry, what’s wrong with lemons? Yeah, you heard me. WHAT IS SO WRONG WITH A GOOD LEMON? Sorry to yell at you first thing on a Friday. I’m just trying to finally understand the phrase “when life gives you lemons, make lemonade.” LEMONADE? I don’t even like lemonade. But guess what I […]
