T-minus 48 hours until I go on vacation, y’alls.
Okay so what does “T-minus” mean anyway? I always feel like whoever says it needs to be wearing aviators, small headphones and a brown bomber jacket. Teddy bear-minus? Thunderstorm-minus? Tap shoes-minus? Tomato hummus-minus?
I’m going to look it up. Hold on real quick . . .
TIME-MINUS. Yeah, I was going to say that next, so whatever.
You know I had a brown bomber jacket back in ’92 in my high school days. But it was 12 sizes too big for me and smelled like oil. I want to say it worked for me, but it did not. It truly, truly did not.
But you know what the old saying is, “Yesteryear is always 20/12.”
What does work for me, in the present time, with a saggy top knot and a fitted gray faux leather jacket that smells like, well . . . okay oil, is a long snorkel sesh through some roasted tomato hummus.
Heeed eeet eeeez on ze Tablespoons. Ignore the part when I said sesh.
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