Friday Flotsam


Baskets of apples in London

Do your teeth ever hurt?

Not like, “ow that hurts,” which is I realize is the way most people would describe pain. Maybe it’s more like, do your teeth ever feel chalky and weak with a twist of dry sticky?

Let me try this again – you know when you scratch your nails down a chalkboard, that feeling you get in your brain and spine and TEETH? It affects your teeth. It pisses off your teeth. Makes them feel like nasty little sticks of sandpapery chalk. I get that same sensation when I touch certain woods and metals. Like, I can’t taste a soup or a sauce with a wooden spoon because it will gross out my mouth, give me the chills and I’ll barf. I always have to switch to a regular spoon to taste.

And yesterday, I was picking up the back patio so that Aaron could start putting his sanded side tables out there in prep for his show this weekend (more to come on this), and I picked up the charcoal grill basket holder thingy to move it, and I almost passed out. My teeth FREAKED. Mouth immediately got super dry, felt like my face was shriveling up like an old haggard raisin.

What the heck, man? Am I half alien? Are my teeth receiving signals from the OTHER MARTIANS JUST LIKE ME? Oh my gawd I knew I felt off yesterday.

Does this happen to you? Look at your fingernails – TELL ME IF THEY’RE GREEN.

Tulips in London

Can I ask you something?

Er, something else?

Okay, I’ve been seeing this name everywhere lately. People are quoting her on Instagraaaaam, and seem to be so inspiiiiiired by her, snapping her taaaaaalking, want to be just liiiiike her, yadda yadda. And I don’t know who she is!

Who is Brené Brown?

Of course I googled her, but I don’t see anything super recent that’s all of a sudden rocking everyone’s face off with inspiration and hashtag life goals. What’s the deal? Is she just a major, fresh role model? Like Roseanne Barr?

Gremlin love

I want to bring something up, but I’m a little bit nervous.

It’s a touchy subject for most, but I feel like we should just be able to talk openly about it and not judge one another or be too hard on ourselves. Lots of people tread lightly with this sort of topic, and it can most certainly be a relationship deal breaker. But it’s been burdening me lately, so I really need to get it off my chest.

Where should I shop for bathing suits?

It is THEE WORST THING IN LIFE. Especially with post-apocalyptic hurricane chainsawed belly aftermath destruction.

I have two beachy vacays this summer, one for work and one for play, that both require me to be in a bathing suit and I cannot even rightly deal.

Thing is, I’ve had this cute one-piece number from Old Navy for years, and it totally works. It’s black, a vintage cut, holds everything in. But I’ve had it . . . forEEEEVVVVUUUURRRR (sandlot style). I really want something new! But I’m terrified.

Do you have any favorite swimwear companies that:

a) aren’t 29572342363 dollars

b) aren’t slutty mcgee

and c) don’t look like a rainbow just hurled

I prefer one pieces, but I’m willing to try two pieces if the bottoms are so high-waisted I’m flossing my teeth with the upper hem. I know you have places. GUIDE ME TO THE LIGHT. Or the sun, whatever.

Oh crap! Speaking of tans, I was supposed to get a spray tan today, and I totally forgot. Eh, I’ll get one next week before we go to Arkansas for Aaron’s second craft show. I’m getting air-brushed, right?

Friday Flotsam - Monet's Water Lilies IN PARIS when I was there. I went to Paris.

You know how everyone totally wanted to learn the “Single Ladies” dance back in the day? You know you stood in front of your TV for hours, watching that video and practicing the moves. And you never got it right, did you? I didn’t either. (Laura and Sarah, do you remember that night we drank a bunch of wine and tried to learn the moves in your living room and on both couches? Even the husbands! Bahahahahah! <I bet they don’t even read this>)

You know what I reaaaaally wish I could learn? The We Got Annie dance. It is absolute perfection, you guys.

You know, when Daddy Warbucks decides he loves little Annie and wants to adopt her, and the lovely Grace Farrell appears in her MAGICAL PERFECT FLOWY yellow dress and twirls around with the cute gardener and they dance like two fit angels of beauty. I need to learn this dance! I tried the other day in my living room. Looked like a broken bobby pin on a mechanical bull. I’ll get there.

Flotsamist Incense Burners

Weekend plans? It’s finally Aaron’s Indie Craft Shoooooow! Pleasepleaseplease, if you’re local, come on by! It’s on Stateline, sort of close to Target – you know that huge field where they have all those Civil War reenactments? That’s the place! I’ll be snapping from the booth off and on all day, and the grems will be there in the afternoon. I’ll snap all those deets in case you want to specifically see them. I know how you people are.

Aaron has some seriously beautiful stuff (incense burners, coasters, bowls, end tables, stools, etc), and I basically want to keep it all but he said no.

It’s both Saturday and Sunday, so you have no excuse.

Just kidding! I’m not bossy.

But you better be there.

Okay bye.



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35 Responses to Friday Flotsam

  1. sharana @ Living The Sweet Life Blog April 29, 2016 at 7:27 am #
    The 'we got annie' dance is the best!! I love that movie, even though I've probably only watched it 102239 times .. an other time won't hurt. Also, I tried watching the remake with Jamie Fox ... no, just no - not my cup of tea... Cameron Diaz just wasn't Miss Hannigan enough - and it just lacked vintage-ness. Good luck to Aaron on his show ... and good luck bathing suit shopping!!
  2. Colleen April 29, 2016 at 7:50 am #
    J.Crew one pieces. Petite, regular, and talk torsos. Cup sizes. Great fabric and classic colors and prints. If you have 7-9 days time for shipping, also Boden. It's a UK brand but they ship to the US. I haven't had a baby but I don't have a bikini bod and both of these brands make me feel pretty great! Good luck!!
  3. Jennifer H April 29, 2016 at 7:56 am #
    Following this because I need a new swimsuit asap! And I'm having thr hardest time drawing with sidewalk chalk with my 3 yr old son because that chalk, it makes my teeth does sandpaper and nail files!!
  4. Brittany | Words Like Honeycomb April 29, 2016 at 8:03 am # tiny bit pricy but good quality and vintage-ish look :) <3
  5. Jules April 29, 2016 at 8:11 am #
    I wanna learn this dance and also just be her!
  6. Lindsay April 29, 2016 at 8:30 am #
    Miraclesuit!!!!! I have the Sonatina (I think that's the name?), and it does allllll the things. Sucks in the gut, lifts and pushes the gals together, lifts the tushie, and basically is my BFF in suit form. Check the site out. You will totes find your perf match, cause you can customize your search like whoa. They are spendy, but last forEEEEEVVVVVVUUUURRRE ? and I pinky promise you won't ever go back. P.S. Thanks for your response to my comment the other day. Reason 1029374745 that you are one of my favorite blog celebs. Shush. You are a blog celeb. Deal with it. ? xoxo
  7. Laura April 29, 2016 at 8:34 am #
    Excuse moi—I totally read this. I have pictures from that night, but I won't embarrass any of us with the evidence. Let's just say that we all have grape-colored smiles, glassy eyes, and semi-sweaty hair from our sweet moves. Also, agreed with Colleen above on the swimsuit sitch. That little number I showed you the other day? It's from J. Crew. Granted, they're not eight-dollar cheap, but they're not Anthro-ridic, either. Love your face. Can't wait to hug it in July!
    • Bev Weidner April 29, 2016 at 8:57 am #
      Hahaha! I knew you did. :) JULY. So close. We can do this. (maybe)
  8. Anonymous April 29, 2016 at 8:47 am #
    I love Coco Reed bathing suits every time. Love them.
  9. Lisa April 29, 2016 at 9:04 am #
    AlbionFit has some great, great swimsuits - I love their one-pieces. Their suits are modest and have good quality so they last a long time! I have a few pieces from them and I LOVE it.
  10. Darcy April 29, 2016 at 9:32 am #
    Nordstrom had the cutest crochet one piece last year, which of course they don't have this year - but this one is close, and by the same maker. I've also heard Athleta has good suits, and if you're a Costco member they always have high quality one pieces at a low price, but you don't have many styles to choose from. Good luck with your husband's show!!!
  11. Deana Greenberg April 29, 2016 at 9:34 am #
    I like Lands End swimsuits and they always seem to be having a sale!
  12. Kathleen April 29, 2016 at 9:41 am #
    I love J.Crew's one-pieces. Also, Athleta has cute, comfy, swim suites that fit really nice and are good quality. Good luck! :)
  13. Lindsay April 29, 2016 at 10:11 am #
    I've seen a lot of, and heard a good deal about, these swimmies [] The colors/patterns/cuts change fairly often, aka if you don't love what you see you can always check back later! And the mix and match top/bottom option is always a a winner in my book depending on what you're looking for coverage wise. Might be a fun option worth looking into!
  14. Laura Lee April 29, 2016 at 11:03 am #
    I have trouble with eating Popsicles because the feel/taste of the wooden stick freaks me out.
    • Bev Weidner April 29, 2016 at 11:29 am #
      Exactly! Exactly! I just got chills and my mouth went completely dry just thinking about it.
  15. Stephanie April 29, 2016 at 11:26 am #
    I also dreaded bathing suit shopping post-baby but I read this and it helped a lot!! Good luck!
  16. Beth in Iowa April 29, 2016 at 12:06 pm #
    Check out they have a great variety in one piece as well as two. They supplied some of the suits for the Sports Illustrated issue. I have purchased two recently. One for lap swimming and a two piece with the higher rise bottom. Great prices and so far I really like the quality. Good Luck with the craft show!
  17. Ro April 29, 2016 at 1:07 pm #
    Besides having a fabulous name, Brene Brown, is a witty and brilliant woman that gave one of the most amazing, inspiring TED talks ever. If you haven't watched it, stop whatever you are doing, google it and watch it now. Right now. Go. I'll wait...
    • Dana April 29, 2016 at 3:17 pm #
      I second this! Watch her TED talks and you'll see why she is so beloved!
  18. Leslie Perlera April 29, 2016 at 1:08 pm #
    Watch Brene Brown's ted talk on Vulnerability! It's enlightening.
  19. Angie April 29, 2016 at 1:20 pm #
    I can't touch styrofoam - especially the stuff squeezed into cardboard boxes!
  20. Kim @ Adventures in a New(ish) City April 29, 2016 at 1:36 pm #
    I CANNOT USE WOODEN CHOPSTICKS WITHOUT WANTING TO GAG ALL OVER MY SUSHI!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sorry, for the caps and exclamation points, but girl, I thought I was alone in the universe. Seriously, what is that about?!!?
  21. Bonnie April 29, 2016 at 1:50 pm #
    I got two suits that fit your description on a recent trip to Marshalls. Or was it TJ Maxx? Either way, my point is that I went in the store for something like candles and accidentally hit the jackpot. One suit is Michael Kors. The other is Tommy Bahama. Both are one-piece, high quality material and super sleek yet cover and support in all the right places. And they were both under $30. The problem with these stores is you don't always succeed if you go in on a mission. However, they can be an oasis in the desert if you happen in on a day when all the stars are aligned. The main takeaway here is that these two designers make suits that are affordable and actually wearable for people who DONT have a 14 year olds body. The hope is that you can score one from a discount store and rock the designer style without making your credit card smoke when you swipe it!! Good luck! And make sure you post what you find!
  22. Amy April 29, 2016 at 3:41 pm #
    Brene Brown has two great TED talks that I have watched several times each on vulnerability and shame! You must watch but make sure you watch in order. She uses humor but is very real! She also has a great book out called Daring Greatly.
  23. Denise April 29, 2016 at 5:59 pm #
    Brene was a blogger that rose to major stardom and happens to be incredibly inspirational, she has an awesome story. ?
  24. brandee April 29, 2016 at 7:32 pm #
    You should check out Mikoh or Acacia swimsuits. Super cute and stylish...even the ones pieces are awesome.
  25. Andrea April 29, 2016 at 10:12 pm #
    Speaking of "I know how you people are", where's that bun tutorial?
    • Bev Weidner April 30, 2016 at 6:36 am #
      I cannot BELIEVE you remember that! It's coming soon. . . ish? :)
  26. shannon karas April 29, 2016 at 10:21 pm #
    raising wild for swimsuits. ive been following their insta and they are all srts of beautiful. modest but sexy and beautiful color ways
  27. Christina April 29, 2016 at 10:50 pm #
    YES! A wooden spoon in the mouth, or wooden ice cream stick in the mouth - it's horrifying! I'm so glad I'm not the only one with this phobia. What about drinking a chilled beverage from a mug? That's a big teeth-grinder for me. Hot beverage in a mug - no problem. But cold drink? Ugh. It makes my hair stand on edge.
  28. erin marie April 29, 2016 at 11:01 pm #
    I'm glad I'm not the lone wackadoodle out there! I cannot be in the presence of frost or ice being scrapped from a windshield let alone perform it, think about it or TYPE it, without internally screaming, whilst my teeth retract into my gums and my eyeballs squeeze into their sockets. Similar reaction to witnessing someone bite into a popsicle or ice cream. I am literally freaking my face out posting about this right meow. EEEK!!!
  29. Emily May 2, 2016 at 9:34 am #
    Swimwear Solutions in Leawood. I have bought my last 3 suits there.
  30. Jacqueline May 5, 2016 at 8:49 pm #
    I would have to say either or
  31. Erica May 19, 2016 at 8:39 pm #
    My daughter was big into grinding her teeth up until a few months ago. Each time she did it I'd get this sick feeling that would start in my teeth and travel right to my soul. One time I almost ran myself into a glass sliding door (think of those crows and seagulls in The Birds) because it drove me to a horrified state of tooth-aching madness.

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