Friday Flotsam

Frrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrroydoy.

Why do you think we say “smart cookie?”

“Oh, she’s a smart cookie. She’ll go far.”

Smart cookie? I don’t feel like cookies are the smartest of treats. Correct me if I’m wrong (I’m no baker), but aren’t they among the simplest of desserts? What’s so smart about a cookie?

What about, “Oh, she’s a smart macaron.” (but you have to twist your mouth into a French accent on the word macaron.) Macarons are NOT easy to make. You have to be pretty smart to know how to get that ish right.

Or even, “Oh, she’s a smart tiramisu.” I mean, all those layers. And the soaking! There’s so much soaking.

Or, “Oh, she’s a smart rainbow layer cake.” Again with the layers. And all the colors! So many colors.

Or or or, “Oh, she’s a smart bread pudding baked Alaska.” I don’t even know what that’s about but I’m positive you need brains for it.

Look, I’m not trying to be turd. I just feel like we need to go back to the drawing board and rethink this whole smart cookie thing.

Thanks for being there for me.

I have a weird question.

You’re like, “sh…ocker.”

Do any of you listen to classical music while reading? As in, at the same time? I never have but sort of feel like they would go hand in hand. Don’t you suspect it would enhance the reading experience? Maybe only if you’re reading Jane Austen.

I want to try it!

Maybe I’ll read one chapter with classical music on. And then once chapter in silence. Just to compare the two emotional results. Right? Sound like a plan?

Also you can probably tell by now but I need friends.

POOOOOOOOOOLL-AH!

Yesterday’s recipe post including Rotel as an ingredient, got me wondering, Carrie Bradshaw style:

Do you call cheese dip CHEESE DIP? Or ROTEL?

Because are definite camps in this country that use the literal word ROTEL to describe the cheese dip they’re bringing to the Baptist church potluck.

Hey, man – I’ve totally been there. Back in the ’90s there was a chunk of time when, “I’ll make Rotel!” meant, “I’ll make cheese dip!” Miss those days.

Is this you?

Back row? Anyone?

Now I’m hungry for Rotel. I mean cheese dip.

UUUUUUGH, SPEAKING OF:

I’ve got an announcement.

And this is hard for me to put into words on screen. I partially blame Aaron because this was his idea. And I’m not one to be left in the dust on personal productiveness and progression, you see.

For the month of August we’re going Paleo.

And you know what, I don’t even know what Paleo is. I thought it was some sort of astrological sign. Or an ancient pizza dough spinning technique. Hold on, I’m gonna Google it. One sec. Don’t go anywhere.

. . . OKAY WHATEVER, AARON.

We’re going to eat like cavemen? No dairy or bread? BAHAHAHAHAHA. Mine will be partial. He can have his own fun with birdseed.

I’m all in for low-carb. But I’m not giving up my cheese. More like, PaleNo.

Two things: (this is where you come in, obviously) – would you mind giving me some Paleo-ish recipe ideas? These will mostly be posted in September, as some August recipes have already been shot. (“I’m NOT THROWING AWAY MY. . .SHOT.” Why yes Hamilton is in my brain 24/ 7 now, thanks.)

My main deal for August is . . . . wait for it, no wine. Yes you just read those words on Bevcooks.com.

Okay, my birthday is in August, so we’ll allow for that weekend, duh. And my parents’ visit next week (we’ve all tested for the Covid – negatories here! waiting on their results and quarantining until then) Other than that, zip! Zilch! NADA. (not even tonight. I started on Monday, can you believe that?)

Want to try it with me?

Wait why are you laughing?

Weekend plans?

I’m replacing all our door knobs with glass and brass to look just like an ancient French chateau because we’re in a pandemic and what else do we have?

This weekend is also one of those, “let’s deep clean all the kitchen drawers, do some paint touch-ups here and there and organize the basement head to toe while listening to Taylor Swift’s new supposed indie album! Sound fun, everyone? Hello?. . . hello?”)

From this week, in case you missed it!::: A CHEESY Tomato Gratin. Yeah, yes, yeppers. And Slow Cooker Creamy Chicken Sliders. Another absolute must, y’all.

Off to make Rotel since I can’t have it until S E P T E M B E Rwaaaaah.