Friday Flotsam

f R r R i I d D a A y Y.

feet, soup, plants


I might be doing motherhood wrong.

Because listen to this.

So, I’m a person who needs water by me all the time. It’s on my table next to my laptop, in my purse when I run errands, in the car when I drive, ON MY BEDSIDE TABLE AT NIGHT. Right? Right.

I’m a constant sipper, I am.

So naturally to the kids I’m always like, “Do you need some water? You need some water! Did you drink enough water at school? You didn’t drink enough at school, I can feel it! Here, drink this water! TAKE THE WATEEEEEERRRRRR.”

And when we put them down at NIGHT (yes, nighttime, in bed, where they’re about to snooze for 12 whole hours.), I’m like, “Drink some water! Let me refill this water. If you need water in the night, it’s right here, okay? I don’t want you dehydrated. Drink this. It is the KEY ELEMENT OF LIFE.” (Really, if you ask Nat what water is, she’ll reply, “Well my psycho mom says it’s the key element of life.”)

Okay, so I’m in NYC a few weeks ago with a few of the Food Network execs at this fundraiser dinner, and I’m sitting next to this unbelievably polished New York City woman with the silkiest brown hair, the shiniest rose-colored dress, and the biggest, most kindest eyes I’ve ever seen. We’re talking about our kids, ya know. Routines, personalities, quirks. Then I ask her what their bedtime routine is like. She tells me theirs. I tell her ours. Which includes making sure they have enough water in the night so they don’t dry out and shrivel up like alien raisins by morn.

YOU GUYS, her jaw dropped to her rose-colored heels, “YOU GIVE THEM LIQUIDS AFTER 6pm?”

Me, sweating, “….Well yes? Why? Do you not?”

Her, “And do either ever wet the bed at night?”

Me, about to faint, “Well…I mean, Nat does from time to time. Will never has to this day. Not one single time. Literally. And I don’t mean literally like the Kardashians mean literally.”

Her, “OHHHHHH, HUN. We have a hard rule in our house. No liquids after 6pm. Nothing. Capped. YEW DUN.”

And then it dawned on me, how I’m always like, SO SHOCKED when Nat wets the bed.



Okay. I get it.

What’s your rule at home?! Do you cap the liquids at a certain time? Was this in the handbook and I missed it? Should I be fired from motherhood???

Don’t answer that.

strings lights in the dark

So like, I was waaaaay into Kate and William when they got hitched all those years ago. But to be honest, I’ve barely, and I mean baaarely paid a lick of attention to Meghan and Harry.


All that Markle drama! Like, what on earth, DAD. And the evil half siblings! What is their deal?? Do you know? I tried catching up on a few gossip sites, but I only got as far as knowing that Papa Markle had some staged photos taken with the Papz, sort of governed by the SISTER, to show off how “healthy and cool” he is? Is that right?


Then he changed his mind three and a half seconds later, “I HAVE TO BE A PART OF HISTORY.”

Now he’s like, “Well crap I have to have surgery. Laaaate.”

But apparently Meghan’s mom has been super chill and poised the whole time. Or did I make that up?

I guess the bigger question is, are you getting up to watch the wedding tomorrow morning!?

I still can’t decide. Historic moment orrrrrr sleep.

I’ll probably get up. Ugh.

Also, Meghan Markle is definitely Punky Brewster, right?

Just kidding!

Wait, was she?

tent in the backyard!

Also, #teamlaurel all the way.

sandals, wine, candle, blanket, grass

The other morning I started out on a run, got two whole streets away, and was so annoyed and confused at why my shorts were riding up my butt like soldiers on the front line.


So I had to run home, turn them around, and start over. I was this close to changing on the street, but I knew that somehow my mom would sense it and slip into cardiac arrest.

You’re welcome, MOM.

Also, on Mother’s Day, we took a leisurely bike ride over to a popular, semi-crowded park. There I was, biking through a lush, grassy meadow, in my little mules, my little cutoffs, my little off-the-shoulder top, and my little sun hat. So cute, right?

And then I crashed. Straight up, toppled over, on my face, in the grass. EVERYONE SAW. And I can tell you, that situation went from, “That girl is so cute,” to, “That girl thought she was sooo cute.”


And no, it had nothing to do with rosé, don’t look at me like that.

our backyard climbing roses

Weekend plans?

I’m hosting a little casual outdoor soirée tomorrow afternoon for our neighbors. Help me decide on the sides! We’re having local brats on the grill as the main, so I’m thinking some sort of white bean salad, and maybe grilled corn? What do you think? HALP MEH.

Okay, Meghan was totally Punky Brewster.


, , , , ,

19 Responses to Friday Flotsam

  1. Amanda May 18, 2018 at 9:41 am #
    My kids always drank after 6p and no bed wetting. Weird to cut out liquids after 6p
    • Bev Weidner May 18, 2018 at 10:20 am #
      I know! I mean, to each her own, but I find it so interesting to know what works in different homes!
  2. Emily of The Three Bite Rule May 18, 2018 at 10:20 am #
    I'm thinking eventually I'll need to cut down on the newly (daytime) trained toddler is wearing a pull up at night. He sleeps 12-14 hours at night, and loves life in a crib so I'm riding that train allllll the way. We cut liquids after 8 for our elderly & arthritic dog who will howl to go out at 2am otherwise. No time for that.
  3. Ali Vizzo May 18, 2018 at 10:47 am #
    We don’t push or deny drinks in the evening. What’s worse than being thirsty and not being allowed to drink?!? Our dr says bed wetting is more of a physical maturity thing anyway. All kids stay dry at different times and I definitely see a difference in my two girls.
  4. Anonymous May 18, 2018 at 10:57 am #
    Falling or crashing while in public looking cute is the worst. Years ago was shopping in the mall with bags and iced coffee feeling good and then bam! My ankle gave out, I yelped, and down I went.
  5. Jennifer C. May 18, 2018 at 11:29 am #
    I hate watching videos of people falling and (I always assume) getting hurt but when you told the bike story, all I could think of is how funny it would have been if you were on instagram when it happened! Sorry, Bev, but I'm laughing just thinking about it! P.S. Punky Brewster, for sure!
  6. Mo-Mo May 18, 2018 at 11:36 am #
    True story, one of my son's was a bed wetter, I stopped his drinks by 8pm. My husband didn't like that idea, but he wasn't doing the laundry every day! One night my husband checks on the kids, and there he is, sucking on a wash cloth!!!! I never denied him liquids again... today is his graduation from CSUN.. he turned out alright!!
    • Bev Weidner May 18, 2018 at 11:52 am #
      OMG that's amazing! A washcloth! hahahaha. (and the graduation. ;))
  7. Amanda May 18, 2018 at 12:16 pm #
    Wait a minute. I didn't know about this Markle family drama! Oh girl, now I'm definitely going to get up and watch it!
  8. Megan {Country Cleaver} May 18, 2018 at 12:31 pm #
    Girlllll you know I will be live tweeting that royal wedding. This IS THE DAY I HAVE PREPARED FOR!! I stayed up all night for W&K and now for H&M. I made cakes, scones, I have the TEA, IT.IS.ON. So ya know, text me if you're bored tonight, because no one else i know is being a lunatic like me...
  9. michele @ i-heart-baking May 18, 2018 at 1:12 pm #
    OMG you are SO right, meghan markle totally DOES look like punky brewster! i totally kept thinking she reminded me of someone and now i finally know who!!!
  10. Julie J May 18, 2018 at 1:51 pm #
    "like soldiers on the front line"..........HAHAAAAAAAAA, thanks for making my Friday! You rock.
  11. Nancy May 18, 2018 at 3:29 pm #
    Go to and look under condiments for Brats with spicy cranberry relish. Yum except it just occurred to me you probably can’t get cranberries this time of year. Never mind. But she has other gorgeous recipes so I bet ya could find something to go with your brats. Not giving up any sleep for the wedding but the actual ceremony doesn’t start until 7 EST. I’ll be up by then but would rather go to the farmers market. Ha! Enjoy!
  12. Liz May 18, 2018 at 5:50 pm #
    First, I AM going to get up to watch THE WEDDING because I watched Charles and Diana, Will and Kate and while not a royal aficionado, I still love a happy ending. More important, though … WATER. I take 2 tall glasses of liquid "to bed" with me. I get dry. I don't have children or grandchildren, but I have a puppy. And while all of the stuff says stop water so they can make it through the night … I do NOT!!! He has a water bowl in his sleeping crate and I hear him drinking in the night. And he makes it through the night, although if I get up and that wakes him, we do a "quick piddle outing" … NO BIG Deal. WATER!! IMHO we should all have water/liguid when we need/want it. I do for my pet and I think I would do the same for my child that I do for me. GEEZ.
  13. Laura Lee May 20, 2018 at 10:05 am #
    My guys are 7, I pour water down their throats all day, they have milk with dinner around 6 and then a sip of water when they brush their teeth and that's it. Our son still wets the bed once in a blue moon so I'd never give him more liquids after dinner but if the girl asked I would.
  14. Megan K May 20, 2018 at 6:28 pm #
    Yes to liquids after 6.... how else to finish a bottle of wine? I have not wet the bed that I know of to this date.... unless night sweats count. Yes yes yes to wedding!
  15. Klara Donovan May 21, 2018 at 12:43 am #
    I'm preggers and I'm just thirsty all the time. I keep an insulated bottle of water on my bedside table so it stays icy cold all night, and I sip it every time I wake up to pee. Which is often. Which may actually be due to the sipping. Gahhhh. Worth it. My son is still in nappies but he has a sippy cup of water beside him at night. Sometimes in the middle of the night I'll hear him gulping it down over the monitor. He loves his bedside water! No way will I be cutting him off when he's toilet trained!
  16. Jenna May 25, 2018 at 10:12 am #
    Don't stress about the water at bedtime! Some kids can drink water all night and never wet the bed. Some kids are cut off from water at 6 pm and will wet the bed anyways. Some kids will wet the bed if they drink too much water late and maybe, just maybe, something you do might affect it. You can experiment (try something new for at least two weeks to see if it really does work) orrrrrrrrrr throw a waterproof mattress protector on and let the chips fall where they may.

Leave a Reply