Friday Flotsam


Fall mums

I have the craziest story for you.

This happened to me seriously a year ago, and I’m just now getting around to telling you. (you’re like, WHY START NOW.)

I’m mainly telling you because I want to know how YOU would have handled this. Because I felt like I was on a hidden camera show. With like, my bra hanging out. And we need to rehash it today so I can feel better about my life.

I was shopping for ingredients last October for a client holiday shoot. Specifically, peppermint sticks. I was meandering down the candy aisle at a large grocery chain, “Peppermint sticks…peppermint sticks…peppermint sticks….hmm, I’ll ask this nice aisle man where I can find them.”

Me, “Excuse me, sir – I’m looking for some basic peppermint sticks, like maybe 3-5 inches long, skinny, either straight or with the cane hook at the end. Anything works. Where could I find those? By the way the blue in your shirt brings out the blue in your eyes.” (<-just kidding on that last part.)

Him, all snooty mctooty, “Peppermint sticks? Isn’t that more of a Christmas thing?

Me, “Right? I’m trying to find them for a holiday photo shoot.”

Him, with his face all scrunched up, clearly annoyed at me, “Uhhhh I’m sorry. But this is AMERICA. RETAIL. Wrong month!”

Me, in shock, “…Well you don’t have to say it like that.”

Him, a tad softer, “I’m sorry. I’m having a really bad day. (and then back to being a total d-prick in the same breath.) But you’re not going to find them until after Thanksgiving. So GOOD LUCK.” Massive eye roll at the end.

Me, mentally breaking down, “Um. Wow. Okay.” Legit trembling, I pushed my cart away from him and that haunted aisle, my jaw on my shoes and my eyes filling up with tears. ACTUAL SALT WATER.

Did that just happen!? What just happened? Why did I freeze up!

I finished my shopping in an emotionally-damaged fog, reliving those last moments in my head over and over and over. Why didn’t I say anything! Just stood there. Walked away. A blubbering boo boo head. But! I did go home and call the store management and report his face. So THERE, blue shirt aisle man.

What would you have done?! Let’s brainstorm something I SHOULD have said that day. I’ll show him. He’s going to be sorry he said anything a year later. I’ll go back today and find him and let him have it!

Not really because I’m a sissy.

FALL. Pumpkins, blanket, booties, and booty


In a public restroom, do you prefer the automatic hand dryer? Or the paper towels? You know you fall into one camp or another.

Let’s get even more specific: if the automatic is one of those where you push the button, do you push it? Or would you rather wave your hand under the slot where the paper comes out? Or do you push it with your elbow, and then wave for the towel to open to the door?

Or if it’s one of those where you stick your hands down in that skinny chamber thing and it hyper-dries you, do you prefer that over the button? Or still the paper? Or no paper at all?

Or if it’s one of those where you have to crank the side gear to get the paper towels to come out, would you prefer that over either of the automatic options, just to have a paper towel to open the door with?

Or do you just want a taco?

Photographer Following Kids on the Run

I can’t say the words whirlwind, Marlboro, and chipmunk.

Well, I can SAY them, but I botch them every single time. For some reason my brain makes my mouth say world winn, Marbalow, and chickmunk. I’m sort of lysdexic in that way.

Do you have this problem with any words? Orrrr whatever, smarty pants, I guess you can just say ALL THE WORDS PERFECTLY?


(I’m not mad at you, though.)

Bubble Bath Nat

Guess what I’m finally doing tomorroooooooooooowwwwwwaaaaaaaa.

I’m hosting a rosé tasting party! IAMSOEXCITED. My local Gaggle and I will be blind tasting like, eight or nine different rosés, all different price points, ranging on levels of fruit, dry, yadda yadda. We’ll be voting, rating, pairing with cheeses, drinking, eating, drinking, tasting, drinking and snapping.

You know.

Aaaand I’m going to share all of our radical rosé discoveries with you next week, so you can go drink all the wines yourself. Yippee!

I’ve never said yippee in my entire life. That felt oddly fun.

Have you ever hosted a tasting party? If you have any tips, I’m open to suggestions. I have a basic idea of how I plan to tackle this (HI, MATCHING NAVY BLUE EYE MASKS), but if you’re a pro, hit me up. I think it’s going to super cute.

Also, nine bottles of wine. Ay yi yi. I’d like to apologize for anything that happens on Snapchat and IG Stories tomorrow afternoon from 3-6pm.

Will eating a donut in front of American Flag

Weekend plans? If you’re in the KC area, Aaron has a Flotsamist popup show tomorrow (Saturday) in the West Bottoms at Varnish and Vine from 9-5! I won’t be there. *see above. nine bottles of wine. help.

You’re still thinking about blue shirt aisle meany pants man, aren’t you?






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22 Responses to Friday Flotsam

  1. Jo October 7, 2016 at 7:39 am #
    Ok, the guy in the store. Six years ago I probably would have gotten angry and said something to the effect that he doesn't have to talk to people like that. However, 5 1/2 yr ago my husband got cancer and died in 80 days. During that time, I learned A LOT! I can remember walking through the grocery store, feeling a way I'd never felt before, and never want to feel again. It's such an empty feeling, your head feels like it's full of air and seriously, there is no concentration and very little memory. As I was walking, I thought, "Not one of these people knows what I'm going through." My next thought was that they might be going through the same thing, or worse. So one thing I learned during that time that I always try to remember is that most people aren't arses intentionally. Something makes them that way. I guess now if someone went off on me, I would look them right in the eye and say, "I'm really sorry you are having such a bad day" and smile and walk away. I mean, we can't let stuff like that upset us because they probably deep down don't even mean it. If we hurl back some snappy retort, we are sinking to their level. I've learned that 80 days goes awfully fast, and we just don't have time in this life to be mean to people. We all just need to chill and make the best of every minute we have. Amen. PS - I have fixed 3 of your recipes and every single one of them is delicious! DeelishUS
    • Pam October 7, 2016 at 11:08 am #
      Jo, so sorry about your husband. I agree with you 100%. "Sorry you having such a bad day". Perfect!!!!
    • Julie October 7, 2016 at 11:39 am #
      So sorry about your husband! I had the exact same thought when reading this... the guy admitted he was having a bad day - maybe he or a loved one had just gotten a bad diagnosis, maybe his dog died, maybe there's a problem w/ his child... who knows? When someone acts that way, 99% of the time it's not about you, it's about them. I know it's hard when we feel we've been treated rudely for no apparent reason, but maybe both of their days could have turned out a lot differently if she would have taken a step back instead & said, "I'm sorry to hear you're having a bad day. Is there anything I can do? Would you like to talk about it?" I realize that in the moment this can be difficult, but sometimes God puts us in these situations for a reason.
    • Bev Weidner October 10, 2016 at 9:23 am #
      Jo, thank you for your comment! It makes my DAY to hear that you've been enjoying my recipes. I'm also so sorry to hear about your husband. And I completely agree with you! I was just wanting to talk about how people might react to sour crabs in public. Do you freak, keep your cool, retract and cry within? :) But yes! Can't let them get to ya. For sure. Have a great week!
  2. Hilary October 7, 2016 at 8:08 am #
    I think you said the right thing to the blue shirt grocery employee. If you had said something snappy back you could have either 1. Caused him to behave worse or 2. If he was really lashing out because of a bad day it could cause him to break down. I think either of those would make you feel worse, and not get the response you wanted which was an applogy.
  3. Phi @ The Sweetphi Blog October 7, 2016 at 9:49 am #
    I think your rude blue shirt guy picked up and moved to Milwaukee in the last year, because THAT SAME FRIGGIN THING HAPPENED TO ME two weeks ago, but instead of peppermint sticks it was pumpkin puree. The guy was so rude, and for no reason at all! I wanted to say - hey a-hole, I'm sorry my need for pumpkin puree (<- or insert ingredient of choice that is 'seasonal') has caused such a repulsive reaction that you feel the need to tear me down - but instead I did the same thing as you and just left. I'm a wimp. At least you called and reported him, I, on the other hand got so annoyed I didn't even do that, but decided instead to go to Target. And they have everything there, so problemo solved. Regardless, sorry that happened to you. And automatic paper towels all the way.
  4. Caitlin October 7, 2016 at 10:28 am #
    I'm going to chime in just to say America, retail, wrong month? Has he never stepped foot in Hobby Lobby in late July? It's like glitter Christmas vomited in there! His snappy remark isn't even correct!
    • Bev Weidner October 7, 2016 at 11:37 am #
      AH KNOW. I thought the same thing about Hobby Lobby! Lawdy.
  5. Cathy Wilson October 7, 2016 at 11:12 am #
    Digitally. I can't say that word to save my life. So I just say electronic.
  6. Catherine October 7, 2016 at 12:57 pm #
    I prefer a hand dryer, but if and ONLY if it's one of the newfangled ones that dry your hands in like two seconds. Have you seen the ones that are built into the sink? It's like a Y-shaped faucet and the water come out in the middle and then you put your hands under the side branches and whoosh! Amazing. If it's the old-school kind where you have to press a button and then rub your hands together under a weak stream of tepid air and they're still wet five minutes later, no thanks. Then they better also have paper towels, preferably the automatic ones. Other kinds are acceptable, but only just, and not the kind where you have to yank the towels out with two hands and they always rip. Clearly I have way too many thoughts about this.
  7. Dee @ The Kitchen Snob October 7, 2016 at 2:19 pm #
    Everywhere I've lived in 'Merica, all the Christmas stuff is coming out in October! Ok maybe not peppermint sticks but STILL. Maybe he was jealous you had a glamorous photo shoot to buy for. Secretly, he always wanted to be a photographer and he was stuck stocking shelves. :-)
  8. Megan@Cozy Eats October 7, 2016 at 2:56 pm #
    I like the super air drying things. I have to tell you that when I was in Japan, they had absolutely nothing to dry your hands with in public bathrooms. I just stood there looking around not knowing what to do with myself. Do I wipe them on my pants? Flap my hands around like a psycho? Are there offensive ways to dry your hands in Japan? I did a mix of flailing/wiping on my pants. Now I am actually thankful for anything to dry my hands with in bathrooms, ha.
  9. Heather October 7, 2016 at 3:00 pm #
    Ok! #1: blue shirt guy- you called him out once and it didn't change anything, which means he was to stuck on himself to change no matter what you coulda/woulda/shoulda done. #2 I like paper towels for the single fact that it protects me from the germs on the door handle on my way out. #3 funny pronunciations- too often firefighter comes out as firefarter (no joke!), those moments are really telling of peoples' sense of humor!
  10. Elizabeth P October 7, 2016 at 6:59 pm #
    I would have just slunk away wanting to cry as well. I am totally the queen of having the best argument AFTER I walk away. There have been many one sided car arguments because of this.
  11. Laura Lee October 7, 2016 at 8:44 pm #
    I prefer paper towels any way I can get them! When we visit Ireland they never have any. I was so happy when we landed in Kennedy airport and I could actually dry my hands properly!
  12. Lori S. October 7, 2016 at 8:45 pm #
    I am cracking up at this entire post, from the "you're like why start now" to not realizing how many hand-drying options there are in a public restroom, to the tags at the end of the post. The Friday Flotsam makes my week!
  13. Jenna October 8, 2016 at 5:45 pm #
    I would have reacted in the exact same way you did to the mean blue shirt man, so no help here. My default position to conflict/ when I get angry is for my eyes to fill with salty water. Such a useful response! (Sarcasm)! I am 100% a paper towel person. The hand dryer things freak me out so much that if there are no paper towels I will just dry my hands on my jeans etc (Not ideal). Also instead of reading "voting" at your rose party I read "vomiting". Heh. Hope there was none of that ;)
    • Bev Weidner October 10, 2016 at 9:19 am #
      Bahahahah! That would have made it a true party. :)
  14. Sara Burnette October 9, 2016 at 11:54 am #
    I can't say worcestire, as in the sauce. Or spell it ?And I'm too lazy to look it up or go check in the fridge! And I need paper towels, I hate the hand dryer with that nasty dirty air blowing on me. And why does the word hate autocorrect to love?? Rude.
  15. BRANDY MASON October 10, 2016 at 4:36 pm #
    I'm sorry about the meany-meany blue shirt...I have a tough time with people like that, too. You did the best thing. But sometimes I like to get reallllllllllllll sarcastic and really let 'em have it (when I'm alone in my car pouting about it). It helps me to move on to have that do-over pretend convo just one more time, ya know? Regarding hand-drying options: I like the Dyson super-quickie dryers that make the skin on your hands look insane. In Japan, everyone carries around their own handkerchief/washcloth to dry their hands. I loved this idea, but was always forgetting to bring mine with me, so drying hands downs sides of pants was the norm for me while I lived there!
  16. Heather October 19, 2016 at 11:42 pm #
    So, yeah, late to the party, but I need to comment. I prefer the "stick your hands down the slot turbo hand dryer" combined with no restroom door, just a corner to walk around. That was important; I'm glad I said it. ;)
  17. Anjali October 25, 2016 at 3:30 pm #
    Amelie! Also, saw your adorable little people on the Zara website. Yay!

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