Creamy Sun-Dried Tomato Pasta

Call me Short-Cut Sally, but this here sauce is about to change.your.game.

I really don’t think I can talk about anything else today besides this sauce. You’re welcome?

Thing is, in my head the sauce was going to have much more going on in it. I had all these plans! These layers! These sauce ambitions! I even had posters!

(I did not have posters.)

But in the end, the sauce, as is, was knock-your-face-off glorious. So glorious in fact I rubbed it all over my boobs.

(I did not rub it all over my boobs.)

My mom is seriously removing me from her will right now.

Another thing is, duh, I don’t even have to tell you how brilliant this is for a quick summer weeknight meal, ORRRRR a quick back-to-school weeknight meal. This thang wears two hats, yo. But they’re not like obnoxious Blossom hats or anything. Naw, naw, they’re more like classic, fancy Audrey Hepburn hats. They tilt just a little bit on your head. Where it like, shades one eye, ya know?

Wait, are you gone already?

So you’ll just take an entire jar of drained sun-dried tomatoes and dump it into a food processor. Blitz blitz. Add some cream. Blitz blitz. Now, you can totally swap out any kind of milk in the cream’s place if you want. I just happen to be eating for 30 thousand, and MAMA WANTED CREAM, DANGIT.

Then you just transfer the creamy tomato paste to a saucepan and add some more milk. And some chopped artichoke hearts. And parsley. And simmer simmer simmer until baby bunnies jump out of your heart and hop around in tiny diapers, singing in three-part harmony.

So it’s kind of Tuscany, ya know? A little bit rustic. A little bit smooth. A little bit country. A little bit rock ‘n roll.

And it takes, what, less than 30?

I mean, my gosh.

You’re still thinking about baby bunnies in tiny diapers, aren’t you?

Make this tonight.

Creamy Sun-Dried Tomato Pasta:

What it took for 4:

* 1 (8.5 oz) jar sun-dried tomatoes in oil, drained
* 1 cup heavy cream
* 1 1/2 cup milk
* 1 (6.7 oz) jar artichoke hearts, drained and chopped
* 3/4 pound farfalle (bowtie) pasta
* 1/2 cup freshly chopped parsley
* freshly grated parmesan cheese
* small pinch of coarse salt

Place the sun-dried tomatoes in a food processor and give her a good pulse, until pretty broken down. Add the cream and pulse again. It will become a paste. Don’t freak. It’s okay.

Transfer the paste to a saucepan and add the milk. Bring to a light simmer, stirring. Add the chopped artichoke hearts and a small pinch of salt. Taste it. Kind of want to punch someone, right? Add the parsley. Oh yeah.

Meanwhile, across town, Miranda was learning was it was really like to become a wom – WAIT, wrong thing. Bring a large pot of salted water to a boil. Add the pasta and cook until al dente. Drain and return to the pot.

You can either add the sauce to the pasta and give it a good toss, or serve the sauce on top. Whatever makes ya dance like a sailor.

Garnish with more parsley and parmesan and ohhhhhh maaaaah lawd.

Whatever, cream is the new black.