Friday Flotsam

Frahdeeleeleeelaaalaaaaaalooooooo.

ARE YOU GUYS WATCHING THE PATH?

That sentence totally didn’t need to be in all caps. Let me try again.

Are you guys watching The Path? It’s the same people as FNL and Parenthood, which on PAPER is a done deal. Why on earth would you not watch it? (btw, NO spoilers ahead. promise.) I’ve watched four episodes so far, and while I WANT to like it, and I DO like it, I can’t decide if I like it. It’s     v      v     slow. And a bit dark! Which I don’t necessarily mind. I’m waiting for the giant unravel. Twiddling my thumbs like, “JUST TELL THEM ALREADY.”

But I get super impatient with shows. Like any scene in a movie or TV show where people aren’t super upfront and specific about something, and then someone reads another person wrong, and all these holes are left in the communication, and assumptions are made, and feelings are hurt, and it spirals into a giant mess of WAAAAH, I just go absolutely crazy. Zero patience for it. And then I get all paranoid like, “WAIT. How many times in my life has this happened and I had no idea, and now all these people hate me?”

I might be getting off track.

Anyway, does it get good? I’m going to keep watching, because I like Aaron Paul’s eyebrows and Michelle Monaghan’s high waisted hippy jeans.

Guuuuuess WHAT.

I found a swimsuit. !!! (Do you call it swimsuit, swimming suit, bathing suit, swimwear, or a direct gift from Satan?)

And I like it! See, I’ve had this one from J.Crew in my cart for a while now, and while I keep eyeing it because it’s way purty, but I found a super simple black and white striped one piece (you know my addiction with stripes. I need to seek help.) at TJ Maxx, and it’s awesome! Pulls it all in, keeps the girls up, doesn’t make me look like a torn sack of jelly bellies. I showed you on Snapchat, but I know a lot of peeps are still not into the Snap haps. Which is a WHOLE OTHER SUBJECT.

Just get on Snapchat, why don’t ya.

Let’s talk nail polish!

I need you to be my inspiration station. What’s IN right now? I normally go for nudes, or something in that family. I’m thinking something for BOTH my toes and my fingers and ear lobes.

Just kidding about the ear lobes.

What are some new pretty shades out there? Nothing too bright, unless it’s white. Is white in? What about a pale coraly pink? Or like a panty hose color! OMG, they could call it PANTY HOSE. <–Patent pending.

Hey, while I have you – you know those little white spots on your nails? They’re calcium spots, right? Remind me, do they mean I NEED calcium, I’m getting TOO MUCH calcium, or I just need to order that J. Crew swimsuit? I can’t remember which one it is.

Okay, when was the last time you listened to Jagged Little Pill? You know, Alanis.

Better yet, how old were you when it came out, and what was your era of life? It came out in June of 1995. I was headed to my second year of college in Abilene, TX. I remember like, zillions of girls in denim and khakis blasting that album from their dorm rooms. Me included. However, I had a short bob that spiked up in the back, and cradled my chin in the front. I wore huge, wide-legged jeans and tiny thrifted ringer shirts. I also wore a chain wallet but don’t tell anyone I just said that.

You know what, that album still holds up. Well, almost every song does. Not the third song that’s all, “try a little haaarderrrrr.” I can’t get into that one. But everything else, hail ya. Go listen!

Remember the song, “Visiting hours are 9 to 5, but if I show up at 10 past 6 well I, already know that you’ll find SOMEWAY TO SNEAK ME IN AND OHHHH.”

You guys.

It’s still good.

And Aaron hates me.

Weekend plans? We’re headed to Arkansas today, as Aaron has yet another (!!) craft show in Springdale on Saturday. If you’re in the area, come peep it! We’re taking separate cars, since Aaron’s element is filled with his show goods, so you better believe I’ll be Lilith Fairing my face off the entire way down and back. A ridiculous amount of Indigo Girls is in my future. Ugh.

Also, my favorite small-batch subscription box company, Hatchery, featured me as their Mother’s Day mom! Super, super sweet of them. Here’s the article on that, should you FEEL THE NEED. Not for speed. Just to read. THE NEED TO READ. Sorry?

On that note, Happy Mother’s Day to all you muthuz! Kick your feet up this weekend.

And on a second note, let’s get this Mother’s Day weekend started, shall we?

(aka: more Alanis.)

(Aaron still hates me.)