Friday Flotsam

Foooooorrrrrrrrrdaeeeee.

Let’s have a quick chat about something. And this is mildly controversial, given its popularity and current trending existence. I’m going to let you know gently where I stand. Very gently and very lightly, okay?

Butter boards.

NOOOOOOOOOO EWWWWWWWWW WHYYYYYYY?

Can this end? How can we end this? It is disgusting, unsanitary and barfy to see all over my IG feed all day long. Don’t get me wrong, I love butter. You know this. But all pap smeared all over a bacteria-ridden cutting board with odds and ends from your armpit sprinkled on top? Get out of here. No.

Please tell me I’m not alone in this. Please don’t ask me to make one. I cannot.

Tell me, where do you stand in this booger board trend? Hail naw or where’s the barf bag?

Speaking of armpits, I was at an estate sale yesterday with my friend Mindy and you’ll never guess what we saw in the bathroom. You’ll never guess!

POWDER. Like, a circular plastic pink powder container with a floral design on top and talcum powder in it with a puff thingy for your pits! And I almost died because I USED THAT GROWING UP. I feel like we’ve talked about this before. Have we? Well we’re going to talk about it again because pit powdering!

Did you powder your pits? My mom always said we needed to powder before deodorant so that it would stick and the devil couldn’t get in our pores. (not really, but maybe?) And I remember always saying it like one word: powderanddeodorant. Powderanddeodorant. One word.

Like cheeseonbread. That’s one word, too. Cheeseonbread. Powderanddeodorant.

I kicked the powder to the curb when I moved out, but kept the deo for the BO. Ha! Oh?

I almost bought the powder.

fall flowers / bev cooks

You guys, I have a huge announcement to make. Colossal really.

I’m NOW A SPORTS MOM WHAAAAAAAT. (I’m yelling a lot this morning, I realize.)

I signed Nat up for winter basketball last night. Basketball! Hahahahaha. (you know I love March Madness) My friend Anna walked me through every step because I’m a sports newbie and all the lingo is out of my league (no pun) and she was like, “You can do this! Click that part! No, it’s a drop down. Wrong school. Wrong age. Bev. That one! Breathe!”

She’s also on a waiting list for spring soccer, and my friend Mindy and I might be teaching (don’t make me say coaching do not make me) a girls running team in the spring. What the hell is happening. I would say I’m “leaning in” but I don’t feel like getting divorced today.

Will is perfectly content with guitar lessons and his Harry Potter world, so I’m not pushing it just yet.

I was on a basketball team for a tiny (and I mean tiny do you know me?) stint in elementary school, so it makes sense?

Hold me.

Oh! The apple sangria up there. This is what you’ll do:

  1. three or four sliced apples (any work)
  2. 1 bottle sauvignon blanc
  3. 1 bottle sparkling wine (prosecco is great!)
  4. 1/2 cup apple cider (a cider beer works as well)
  5. one sliced lemon

The end! Serve it over ice with maybe a sprig of rosemary. It’s SO refreshing. And you know, the longer it sits the longer the flavors marry. But honestly who has that patience? No one.

You do know that today is the last day of September and tomorrow begins pumpkin world, so you best dive in today! I mean tonight. I mean today.

Weekend plans?

I’m thrifting today! Halloween costumes are at the top of the list. We’re also trying out a new (to us) brewery with our friends for happy hour today, then coming home, getting cozy (I need to order firewood!) and watching Hocus Pocus 2. I put a spell on yeeeeew.

From this week: Skillet Orzo with Chicken and Olives and Tomatoes, oh my! And then yesterday we have Fish with a beautiful Bean Salad! Insane. Get in both.

Okay so yeah, how do we flush butter boards down the toilet? You in?

, , , ,

21 Responses to Friday Flotsam

  1. Ti September 30, 2022 at 8:19 am #
    I’m down for my own personal butter board but not a a community board. Nope.
  2. Sharla September 30, 2022 at 8:24 am #
    Total agreement on the butter boards—-disgusting!
  3. Laura Lee September 30, 2022 at 8:46 am #
    My Mother was a powderer, scented powder that matched her perfume 😐. It didn't take with me. My children started 7th grade and are finally allowed to do school sports (the town we live in is weird) so they both signed up for soccer. It's 5 days a week, they don't get home until 8 on game days, not sure when they're supposed to do schoolwork! One has a home game and the other has an away game at same time frequently! I HATE it all. Hopefully your experience will be better!😁
  4. C Moss September 30, 2022 at 8:53 am #
    Hi Bev, I am also BEGGGGGING the algorithms to quit showing me these bitter boards. SO GROSS! And I loveeee butter. I LOVE butter. I’m pained to see it treated like this. Thank you for your brace stance.
  5. Andrea Clements September 30, 2022 at 8:54 am #
    Hard NO on the butter boards. We all have that one friend that takes things too far. I feel like that’s how this debacle started. By someone trying to be Pinterest famous.
  6. Phi September 30, 2022 at 9:03 am #
    I am with you - butter boards are gross. I just think of how hard it is to clean the beautiful board underneath!
  7. DAYNA September 30, 2022 at 9:05 am #
    I am totally with you on the butter boards. SOOOO WRONG!!!!!
  8. Christin September 30, 2022 at 9:18 am #
    So glad I'm not the only one on the butter boards trend! I don't like cold butter on my bread anyway, but I just imagine what it would look like after a few people have gotten into it. Blech (me throwing up a little in my mouth).
  9. Paula September 30, 2022 at 9:47 am #
    Butter board trend is the absolute worst, no doubt created by someone with no soul.
  10. Stefanie September 30, 2022 at 9:48 am #
    You just had me dying laughing the whole way through this. I wish we were real life best friends 😂. Agreed butter boards look terrible and now your imagery above will haunt me😂 I am all for down with butter boards. Even though I am pro butter on other things. You will do great as a sports mom:)
  11. Rosemarie September 30, 2022 at 9:50 am #
    No on butter boards Yes on Apple Sangria Yes on being a sports mom now- same boat (soccer and lacrosse and my husband is coaching lol) Yes on firewood and Hocus Pocus Have a great weekend!!!
  12. Jane September 30, 2022 at 10:19 am #
    I am a definite NO on butter boards! Sorry, just gross. But YES! for Nat and sports! Yay for girls who love sports, and their moms who coach!🎉🎉🎉
  13. Heather September 30, 2022 at 11:16 am #
    If you hate butter boards (i do too!) you're gonna really hate cream cheese boards. BLEH! Who is coming up with this crap?
  14. Sue September 30, 2022 at 11:59 am #
    No to butter boards for me! Unhealthy in so many ways!
  15. Lisa September 30, 2022 at 12:51 pm #
    Butter boards = gross. Agree.
  16. Kim September 30, 2022 at 1:01 pm #
    Hayull NO to the butter boards, but you might surprise yourself with the sports mom stuff. I personally avoided sports in HS (Shawnee Mission East, believe it or not! Go Lancers!) but my darling son surprised us with a talent for swimming. I Sports Mommed all the way through his college team career and loved almost every minute.
  17. Sydney September 30, 2022 at 5:26 pm #
    Have you heard of Girls on the Run? It’s a great program for girls that combines joyful running and exercise with important life skills like compassion and self esteem. Super fun! I’m a coach and it’s truly magical.
  18. Sara W September 30, 2022 at 10:06 pm #
    Yes to the powder in the pits and HECK no; butterboards gotta go. So gross. What’s wrong with a butter dish? I don’t comprehend.
  19. Missy September 30, 2022 at 10:31 pm #
    I feel like our cutting boards just always smell/taste/etc a little bit like onion. Yech. (I cut fruit and such on a different one) But no. Just...no. No sports yet, but my 3 y/o little boy wanted to sign up for ballet. Not gonna lie, excited about going to that! 😍
  20. Brandy K October 1, 2022 at 12:30 am #
    I must live in an entirely dofferent world cause I have zero clue what a hitter board is and I’m already saying no 😂 is it like that imitation crab dip thing? Where you spread the cream cheese then cocktail sauce and top with the crab? Served with crackers? Cause if so that’s so good
  21. I October 7, 2022 at 10:06 am #
    Yes finally you’re my favorite. Definitely no to butter/cream cheese/whatever boards. It’s like 2020 taught us (well, them) nothing. Ew. Both the communal sharing m/risk of germs/double dipping/dirty hands/armpit hair, and the unsanitary board. So I’m saying no even if it’s put on a brand new board. Also just.. this whole trend is just a cry for attention. I have been disappointed to see one of my (other) favorite food bloggers jump on the cream cheese/butter board. Second, as a person not from the US, I’m so fascinated with how many extracurricular activities US children do. Good luck to both of you!

Leave a Reply